


The Desert Bloom of Love

by anarchycox



Category: Kingsman (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Time Travel, Angst and Feels, Civilian Merlin, Falling In Love, Historical Inaccuracy, Kingsman Eggsy, M/M, Minor Suicide Ideation, Set in early 1900s, eggsy gets swept off his feet, harlequin style romance, high romance, minor period typical homophobia
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-24
Updated: 2019-07-08
Packaged: 2020-05-19 01:43:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 27,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19347019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anarchycox/pseuds/anarchycox
Summary: A mission takes Eggsy to Egypt and chasing a man through the desert. A strange storm rises up and when he comes to, a gorgeous man is tending to him in a tent. The half Scottish, half Bedouin man doesn't understand half of what Eggsy references, how could he? Weren't exactly cellphones in 1902. As Eggsy heals from his injuries and travels with the tribe, and gets to know Merlin, he starts to wonder, maybe he has finally found where he belongs.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [elrhiarhodan](https://archiveofourown.org/users/elrhiarhodan/gifts).



> my thanks and praise to elrhiarhodan for the gorgeous book cover she made that inspired this story.
> 
> I did some research, but this story is heavily influenced by 90s era mills and boon romance stories, and a great deal of liberties have been taken.


	2. Chapter 2

Eggsy had seen days without sun. Endless grey that sucked out your soul, and you said was fine because you were British, and lived in greys. He had seen snowstorms and thunderstorms that rolled, moving black clouds and white outs. He had seen the world disappear around you.

But this felt different.

He had watched a Ken Burns doc in a hotel, about the depression. The dust bowl storms. Dirt and despair, all coloured sepia. He had had to drink four glasses of water after watching. He wasn’t meant for dry.

He was alone, hadn’t even left coordinates and his glasses were on the fritz. And it was a wall of sand he couldn’t outrun. His motorcycle was kitted for sand, but he was pretty sure that it wasn’t kitted out for that. The man he was chasing disappeared into the sandstorm. Eggsy was sure he had been laughing.

It wasn’t sepia.

He was sure he saw a million colours in the sand headed towards him. It was already choking him, felt like knives against his eyes. He should turn the bike around, run, try to run. But it was so horrifically beautiful. He couldn’t stop staring at it. 

The sun was gone. So gone that he wondered if he had imagined it.

_ I’m sorry Eggsy, but I’m not meant to live here. Daisy and I are going to go west to my sister. We’ll talk plenty though _ .

He couldn’t look above the wall of sand, it was so vast.

_ Eggsy not now, Arthur has me on back to backs. When I’m home we’ll have time to chat _ .

He couldn’t breathe, and was oddly okay with it. It was likely too late anyways, sand in all the crevices of the bike.

_ I am a princess, Eggsy. What we had was good, yes? But we all move on. _

He thought it so odd that he could see blues and greens in the sand. As if each grain carried an oasis inside it.

_ Eggsy, I am trying to run the Kingsman that King left in a mess. You take up too much time, and need to deal with your missions on your own. Fuck off. _

He figured he’d never be found. Maybe he deserved to be forgotten. Roxy forgot the friendship they had built in training. Tilde forgot how they made each other laugh. That vile, sadistic bastard Merlin forgot that Eggsy had saved the fucking world.

_ Eggsy, you are a Kingsman, you can work with Merlin without that chip on your shoulder. I am sorry, but I just do not have the time for your perceived slights. _

Harry forgot that he had ever given a damn about Eggsy.

Eggsy had read thoroughly how to prepare if you get stuck in a sandstorm. He had never wanted to come to desert but he had to prove something, to someone, anyone. Not that they paid attention to him.

The Sahara was beautiful.

The sand was so painful.

But no more than his life had seemed recently.

He knew exactly what he should do then. He had read all the emergency information.

Eggsy just closed his eyes and waited.


	3. Chapter 3

Eggsy was aching and annoyed by it. He rather thought death wouldn’t fucking hurt after it was over. But apparently it did. Maybe this was hell; he deserved that, he supposed what with being a thief, a murderer, and a host of other things. He tried to catalogue the ache. Headache, lips were chapped, and muscles just felt like he had done two a days in full gear. Eggsy groaned. 

Dead sucked.

A wet cloth brushed against his mouth, it stung and then offered relief. Another compress rested against his eyes. Oh that felt good.

Hell was either tricking him, or maybe it was heaven.

Water was squeezed into his mouth. Warm. He coughed, and felt grains of sand scraping at his throat. “More?” he whispered. 

“Of course,” the voice replied, and his head was brought up and he was fed a measly bit of water. “There. Better?”

The accent matched many he had spoken to over the last couple weeks on his mission. North African, Egyptian maybe, the rise and fall just that bit different, even on just a few words. “More?” he pleaded. It felt so good.

“No, we are in short supply right now. No one saw the storm coming, and the animals need it more than a stranger.”

“What hospital runs out of fucking water?” Eggsy sat up, and realized he wasn’t in a bed but on the ground; hospital beds were murder but not like this. The cloth fell off his eyes, and he opened them. Everything was blurry and hurt. “Fuck.”

“Here, goat’s milk will help.”

“Goat’s milk helps nothing except baby goats. What are you on about?” He tried to open his eyes again but it hurt just as much.

“Trust me,” the man said, and Eggsy groaned. 

“Fine,” he agreed, and a compress returned to his eyes and smelled like milk. And bugger if it didn’t feel great. “Guess it is like milk instead of water after spicy food.”

“Aye,” the man said.

“Wow, what?” Eggsy frowned, and it cracked open his lip. “That sounded Scots.”

“Did it now?” Something was applied to his lip. “I am going to move your limbs a bit, see if there is damage. When I found you at the edge of the storm, I was too busy protecting us to care.”

“You found me in the storm?” Eggsy had a horrible thought. “Were you...were you recently in Berlin?”

“Nein,” the man said.

“And now German. Did you study there, doctor?” Eggsy assumed it was a doctor, the way he was being taken care of. Maybe traveling between cities, waylaid by the sandstorm and had come across Eggsy.

“I am no doctor,” the man said. “But I have lived most of my life surrounded by the sand, you learn a thing or two.” The compress was removed from his eyes. “Try now.”

Eggsy blinked a little, and this time when he opened his eyes it was better. Still hurt, but he was able to look around. He was in a tent. “Tent,” he said helpfully.

“So you know what one is, better than the last Englishman I met.” The compresses were rung out into small bowls and laid out. There were carpets on the ground, and a bedroll; a small chest and a what looked like a journal on top of it. “Why were you traveling alone, that is not safe.”

“Was chasing a bloke, maybe you saw him. German, tall. Looked like a cliched villain from a spy movie?” Eggsy raised his brows. “He make it through the storm?”

“Movie?” the man frowned. “I do not know this word.”

“Sorry, my Arabic is half a dozen words. Your English is impressive.” He took a proper look at the man. His head was covered and he was in robes, though different cut and fabric than what he had seen in the city. Roughly woven, hand made. He looked at the tent, and thought about the clothes. “Bedouin?” he asked.

“Aye.”

“With a Scottish turn of phrase.”

“My father’s fault. He was from Glasgow,” the man watched him, “He came to Africa with the military. You did not, though, did you?”

“No, I’m a tailor, looking for material.” Eggsy smiled. “Need to get back to Cairo, don’t suppose you found my motorcycle, or there is a car? Someone could drive me?”

“We move west on the morrow. We do not head back in the direction of Cairo for months.” He looked at Eggsy. “We cannot spare a horse for a man who will just lose it in the desert and die.” He ran his hands over Eggsy’s arms which were stiff and sore, but otherwise fine. But when he reached the legs the barest touch against his ankle had Eggsy almost screaming. “Hmm,” the man cut at Eggsy’s trousers a little. His hands were warm and gentle. He touched Eggsy’s foot. “You feel that?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy agreed. His ankle was swollen. “Is it broken?”

Gentle touches and twists, and the man shook his head. “No, a twist. I will gather more pillows it must be bound and raised.”

Eggsy nodded. “Wait, why would it take months to head back to Cairo? Didn’t think you were as nomadic as you used to be?” He was sure he read on wikipedia that Bedouin tribes were settling more and more into cities and villages. And why would travel take months? “Come on you have to have at least an ATV?”

“Is that a horse breed in England?”

“What are you playing at?”

“What are you?” the man countered. “I will get you care. You will be with us for a time and then we will figure it out.”

“My name is Eggsy. Thank you for saving my life.”

“Salim, but my father called me Merlin, if you prefer that.”

“I know a Merlin, he is a son of a bitch.”

“My mother was a pure woman, of good birth, and beloved by Allah.” The man had a terrifying look and Eggsy gave a nod of agreement. “Call me what you prefer.” Those eyes were sinking into Eggsy, seeing more than Eggsy was comfortable with.  “Are you really happy I saved your life?”

“I don’t know,” Eggsy had to reply.

“I’ll get those pillows. Maybe by the time you are healed, you will know the answer.” The man reached into his pocket, and tossed something to Eggsy - Eggsy’s cell. “That fell out of your pocket. What is it?”

“Android, you an iphone man?”

“Those words mean nothing to me.”

“Bugger, is there no signal? Unless it is satellite?”

“Do you mean the moon?”

“No?” Eggsy tapped his glasses and there was nothing. They had already been on the fritz, and the storm must have destroyed them. “Does your tribe not have any phones?”

“You mean telephone? I know this invention. I read about it.”

“Read about it?” Eggsy wanted to get up, but his ankle was killing him. “That’s it? Read about it?” Something was very wrong. “Salim? Merlin?”

“You are tired and likely a blow to head, making you speak odd words. Rest.” Merlin gave him an encouraging smile and left the tent.

Eggsy kept tapping the side of his glasses but there was no signal to be found.   
  



	4. Chapter 4

Something was definitely not right. Okay fine his glasses were busted, they were both sturdy and delicate, so the things breaking in the storm made sense. And he fucking knew that arse Merlin never gave him the best equipment. He shook his phone close to his ear, and yeah it had sand in it, so not going to work. They had to have a generator, or a phone, or something. He watched the National Geographic channel, there were damn few groups left in the world who didn’t have any outside contact at all. The guy had just been dicking him around. Trolling the Englishman.

Anyone named Merlin, was a dick. It was a scientific fact.

He felt the tent closing in on him. He had no backup, no context for the situation he found himself in. He had sort of been hoping to not find himself in any situations again. But now that he was here, he was damned if he would be trapped.

Eggsy took a few deep breaths and pushed himself up. “Fuck, fuck, fuckity fuck fuck,” Eggsy shouted as he tried to put his weight down. That ankle was fucked up. But he had worked through pain before. He had been beaten bloody, and gotten back up, he could cope with a sprained ankle. But another step had him crying out and collapsing.

“What are you doing?” Merlin had come back, hands full. “You are definitely English, never are any more foolish than them.”

“Yeah, how many you met?”

“Enough. My father sent me to school from 13-17. He wanted me to attend Oxford. I wanted to come home. The rain, the green, the other boys, I did not want that.”

“Were they racist as fuck?” 

“You curse so easily,” Merlin shook his head. “They were worse about me being Scottish, than of the desert.”

“Yeah, that sounds about right,” Eggsy had to agree. “So, we done with the joke?” Eggsy looked at his ankle. “That needs ice.”

“In the desert?”

“Okay, yeah, but then, an anti-inflammatory?”

“Anti-inflammatory, what?” Merlin was moving his trouser leg out of the way, and water was pressed against the ankle and it felt a bit good, the skin so hot that even tepid felt cool. Eggsy was a lost, the man was being so careful. Kingsman medical were brilliant, but not exactly warm, tender. This man was gentler than he was ever used to. The ankle was dried, and slowly wrapped. “Too tight?”

“No, feels fine.”

“Really, the cries of pain are all gone?” Merlin moved things about so the ankle was elevated. “You will not be able to ride tomorrow. We’ll put you in one of the caravans with the elderly, or the children.” Merlin smiled at him. “Or the goats.”

“Bruv, please, cut the act out. I just need to get back to Cairo and call my boss. Someone can be spared to drive me there.”

“It is too long a journey right now,” Merlin said. He handed a bowl to Eggsy. “Eat.”

“It doesn’t…” Eggsy did not want to be rude, but it did not smell fantastic. And he wasn’t quite sure what it was. “Thanks.” He ate a bit and it was better than he expected. “Goat?” he had had lamb curry regularly, and it had a similar but completely different vibe.

“Aye,” Merlin nodded. “Englishman on business in Egypt is common enough. And in the cities to the west as well. But they never travel alone. Too scared of the desert, too scared of us. Are you who make clothes, braver than your soldiers?”

“I can take care of myself,” Eggsy replied. He made a face when Merlin gestured to his ankle. “Like I could expect a storm like that. It was weird.”

“It was.”

“Look I don’t expect you to understand, know you are probably used to - wait, really?” Eggsy frowned. “You thought it an odd storm.”

“It called to me,” Merlin said slowly, like he was thinking through his words carefully. “A storm should not call to you. Many children’s stories, legends, all say when a storm calls to you, block your ears and cover your eyes, do not be fooled. Do not be seduced. That is the devil calling to you. Ignore him.”

“But you answered the call.”

“I’ve never been very good at listening to advice.” Eggsy was a little charmed by the man’s self deprecating smile. “It was a small storm, for such things.”

“It was huge,” Eggsy countered. “I couldn’t see the sun, the sky, nothing but sand that shifted colours.”

“That is not possible.”

“What year is it, Salim?” Eggsy looked at him. “No fucking jokes, no playing, swear it to your god as you say it, what fucking year is it?”

“1902,” Merlin replied.

“2016,” Eggsy answered. “When I saw that storm, I was chasing a man, and it was 2016.”

“Because tailors chase men in 2016?”

“He stole my thread.” Eggsy gave him a sharp grin.

“Did he now?” If Eggsy had thought his smile deadly, Merlin's could cut wire, could cut him, if he let it.

“I think we should be a little more concerned that you think it is 1902?” Eggsy pointed out.

Merlin shrugged, “I think I should be more concerned that you think it 2016. I have 150 people out there who would agree it is 1902. You stand alone in this.”

Eggsy was used to standing alone, not like anyone had truly supported him anyways. He held up his phone. “Tell me you’ve seen the like of this.”

“Nae, I cannot,” Merlin shrugged, “But there are more things in heaven and earth, and just because my eyes have not seen it before does not mean it isn’t real in some other part of the world. There is no train here, but that does not mean it is not around the world.”

“A zipper, my trousers have a zipper,” Eggsy said. He didn’t think trousers had zippers in 1902. He moved the flap to show it. “See that’s weird, innit?”

“I have seen much odder.”

Fuck, this guy was not cutting him any slack. “Okay.” Eggsy’s gun had been lost in the storm, but he held out his signet ring. “This has an electrical charge in it.”

“Electricity is well understood.”

“In a fucking ring?” Eggsy tried to get up, but shifting his weight even a bit had his ankle flaring. “Cars, airplanes, you can circle the whole fucking planet in the sky in like a day.”

Merlin smiled, “Jules Verne.”

“You are killing me!” 

“No, to kill that which I saved would be foolish. I am a man of impulse but rarely a fool.” Eggsy watched Merlin watching him. “Tell me something I could never guess at.”

“I fuck men and no one gives a shit,” Eggsy snapped thoroughly fed up. “How’s that? In 1902, plenty of people did. And sure some wankers in my time do too, but the law? The law says I can marry the bloke I am with. To death do us fucking part. But if it don’t work out, we can divorce. Which yeah exists in your time, in some places - but again no one gives a flying fuck. I suck cock, just as much as I shag women, I love both. And my boss, my mum, my friends, don’t give a damn. It is just just as if I were left handed. A fact about me, that’s it. How’s that for 2016. Could you imagine that?”

“You lay with men?”

Eggsy’s brain caught up with his mouth and if it was 1902, and he was with a Beduoin group with no way of escape, things might have turned wrong very quickly. But he was not backing down. “Sometimes we don’t lie down,” he snarked.

“I always find that hard on my back. Chairs are nice though. When I am in a place with them.” Merlin picked up the bowl. “You need to rest. We shall see after if you still believe in 2016.”

“2016 is coming whether you want it to or not,” Eggsy pointed out. Then Merlin’s words registered. “Wait...you said...you mean with girls.” No way did this man just admit different.

“If in your time it doesn’t matter, does it matter what I meant?” Merlin countered. “Rest. We will speak more later. People are curious about you, I can keep them away for a bit. Another of my oddities that I collect. An Englishman is no odder than some things I travel with.”

“You collecting me?”

“Do you need collecting? You certainly need minding.”

“I can take care of myself.”

“Yes, but for right now, you do not have to. Lay down your burden, young man. You do not need that weight right now. Not on that ankle.” Merlin smiled, and disappeared again.

Eggsy would have loved to get the lay of the land, and he didn’t trust so many strangers around him, but his body was still so worn down, his soul worn thin, that he fell asleep. He was sure the guy would turn out to be an arse, but he could deal with it then. It was so odd to be looked after. He shouldn’t trust it. But barring the ankle pain, it was the best sleep he had had in a long time.

 


	5. Chapter 5

When he woke again, he was desperate for a piss. Eggsy looked around the tent for a moment, expecting a bog to magically appear. It did not. And even in 2016, not like the desert had plumbing. He got himself up, and hobbled out of the tent. The sun was blinding; he closed his eyes and started to sway.

“Foolish Englishman,” a voice said, soft and high. “You do not stand yet.”

He squinted and looked at the woman, who was tiny. Like tinier than Roxy tiny. But had that same fight me look in her eyes. “I need to ummmm…”

“You had a pot in the tent.”

“Where?” He swore he hadn’t seen one. The woman went into his tent, and moved a piece of fabric hanging from the top and there was a chamber pot. “Oh. I thought that was the back of the tent.”

“Because you took a hit to the head, and have been rendered a simpleton?”

“Oi, bit mean?” He really didn’t like that the tiny woman was helping him to the back there. “You remind me of someone, you know. She’s a pain in the arse too.” And he really didn’t like that he needed the help. He figured that with the two Merlin’s, even money she was a Roxy as well. “What’s your name?”

“Rebkah,” she said. “Salim and I are cousins.” 

Eggsy went and took a leak, while she was waiting just on the other side of the curtain. “Has he, what has he said about me?”

“He found you in the desert on one of his wanders,” she replied. “He kept you, as he does most of the things he finds.”

“He didn’t -”

“Mention that you think it is 2016, of course not,” she answered. “I hear no more piss, you are done?”

“Yeah,” he said, and came back out. A look from her had him lying back down. “It is 2016.”

“For you, perhaps. Out there not so much.”

“That it, for you easy as that?”

“We move tomorrow, I have no time to care.”

“Your English is really good.”

“Salim’s father gave lessons to those who wanted it. In the city there are enough of you that, some knowledge is handy.” She checked the ankle and put it up again. “I do not need to believe you about what year it is, to be able to help you.”

“That’s fair. I’m pretty sure this is all a dream anyways. Too many parallels to life. Bet I’m in a coma in a hospital, and made you all up.”

“So you made up a tiny, angry woman, who has too much to do and is listened to by not enough?”

“Yeah, I work with a woman exactly like that. Roxy. Rebkah, Roxy? Fits.”

“You dream of sand?”

“Well the last thing before I woke was a sandstorm, so makes all the sense.”

“Would your brain not come up with something nice? Not alone, injured, lost?”

“No, see, if my brain came up with something nice, I’d know 100% it was a dream. Nice isn’t for me.” Eggsy just shrugged. “No big deal.”

“A very big deal,” she replied. She cupped his cheek. “I still think you just took a blow to your head and are confused, but if what you say is true. If you moved through time, that is swimming against the current. That is an impossible thing. You think nice is an impossible thing for you.”

It wasn’t a question, but it was, and since this wasn’t real, he could be honest. “Yeah, nothing is ever good for me.”

“If you moved through time, perhaps Allah wanted you to see, nice can be achieved. Good can be for you, if you look in the right spots. Get more rest. I am in charge of you tomorrow, and you will not slow me down.”

Eggsy lay in the tent and stared at the ceiling. But he had slept so much that day, that more rest was impossible. He was not used to this much alone and still. He got back up and hobbled outside. He ignored the glare that Rebkah gave him as he moved through the camp. It was harder to ignore all the other stares, but he managed. He made note of the surroundings, kept an eye out for anything modern, anything at all. But he didn’t see a fucking thing. Not one piece of equipment or a generator. Nothing that was out of place for 1902. He walked until he reached goats. 

He had never been to a petting zoo, wasn’t sure he had actually seen goats in person before. They were funny looking. Eggsy kept hobbling until he was at the edge of the camp and then a little farther and collapsed against a small dune. He watched people moving about the camp, and the person who had been minding the goats had hurried into the central path between the tents. Eggsy was not surprised when he saw Merlin headed towards him.

He was a little surprised that he was able to tell it was Merlin, since every man was dressed the same with only a bit of difference in colour or how a belt was tied. But when your dream mind creates a fantasy man, it would make sure that he was easy to pick out.

“Have the English become even more foolish in 2016?” Merlin asked as he loomed over Eggsy. “You set back your progress. You're healing. You care so little for yourself?”

“Well, I was kinda hoping that a magical sandstorm would take care of my worries, so yeah guess I don’t care much.”

“Care.”

“Why?” Eggsy looked up at him. “Why should I care?” Merlin sat next to him, and they watched the camp move about, starting to prepare for tomorrow’s move as the sun touched the horizon. 

“Because sand is cruel, and if you were meant to die, you would be dead.” Merlin picked up some sand and it ran through his fingers. “Rebkah is worried about you.”

“She seems like a worrier.”

“Aye,” Merlin smiled a bit. “Should she be worried about you?”

Eggsy watched the people moving about. “Not beyond the fact that I’m either stuck in the past, or stuck in a dream.”

“Which is easier for you to believe?” 

“The past,” he finally had to admit. “Because if it was a dream, the goat shit smell would not be there. Why is there so much smell of goat shit?”

“How do you think we fuel our fires? With trees?” He gestured to the desert.

“See, yeah, right there? No way does my brain dream up goat shit fuel. There would have been magic trees or something.” Eggsy sank his hands into the sand. “But a dream, or let’s call it what we me, a coma, you either wake up from it, or you don’t. What happens next?” 

Merlin gently pulled his hands out of the sand. “There is pain and suffering hidden in the sand. We be cautious about how far we dig in.”

Eggsy began to laugh, and then the laughter turned to sobs. He was grateful, more than grateful, that Merlin didn’t touch him, or offer any bullshit comfort. He just sat there, a presence. Calm, steady. There had been so little of that in his life. He had thought maybe Harry, but Harry was just as much a mess as Eggsy; he just could tie a better windsor. “Sorry, you talking about like snakes, or me?” he managed to say. He looked at Merlin. “Sorry, that when a fucking miracle seemed to have happened, you got stuck with me.”

He had to look away, Merlin’s gaze too intense. “Sorry that when a miracle happened, you got stuck with us,” Merlin said. “I am sure there are other places you would have preferred to visit.”

“Would be nice to have met Robin Hood.”

“A favourite tale of mine, as well. Any that stuck it to the English kings, is someone I approve of.”

“I bet,” Eggsy looked around, at the small encampment, and the vast desert. “How do I find home, Salim? Where do I even begin?”

Merlin stood and offered his hand and began to help Eggsy walk back to the tents. “Who is to say that you didn’t find home, Eggsy?”

Eggsy looked back to the desert and for a moment he thought he saw the sand rising, calling to him. He closed his eyes and when he looked back, it was still. “Not had a proper home since I were 6.”

“Then isn’t it good you were sent to us? Let us get you settled, the call to prayer is about to begin.”

Eggsy insisted he be deposited by a fire, and Rebkah handed him a bowl. It tasted better the second time. Not good, but better. “So, 1902. Is it any good?” he asked her.

“It is a year, like any other,” she shrugged. “It is what we make of it, yes?”

Eggsy watched Merlin join the other men and bow his head to the ground. “Guess we are going to see what I make of it then.” 


	6. Chapter 6

He had expected to wake up to chaos of the camp packing up, but that would have been foolish, when he thought about it. They had to do this a few times a year, of course it would be a well oiled machine. He hobbled about and found Rebkah. “What can I do to help?”

“Stay out of the way?” she suggested. She pointed to a cart. “There you go with the children.” She pointed at another. “Or the old who cannot walk. Just like you.” She went into the tent he had been using, and began to pack. 

It was an easy pick for him, and he hobbled over to the children. He gave a small wave, said hello in his shakey Arabic. The half dozen children just looked at him, and at his clothes were he supposed looked odd to them; they were also getting a little gross at this point. The just kept staring and he thought maybe he should have picked the old people. He stuffed his hands into his pockets, and found a coin. Eggsy grinned, and pulled out the coin. Said 2012 on it didn’t it? He’d have to show Merlin later. But for right now the date on it wasn’t important. What was important was his plan. He held up the coin to show them, and did a few simple slight of hand tricks. They stared at him silently and he was pretty sure 1902, they wouldn’t think he was doing witchcraft. He pulled it from behind a girl’s ear and immediately a little boy checked behind and she hit him. “Rebkah your mummy?” he guessed.

She grinned, nodded, and spoke incredibly quickly; Eggsy understood maybe five words. But he thought he knew one. “More?” he repeated and they all nodded and clapped. He moved the coin about back and forth, rolling it over his fingers, dropping it from noses, all simple things he had taught himself when he was restless and the kids thought it amazing. He was still working when there was a sharp whistle and the children immediately all clambered into the cart. Rebkah’s daughter gestured and he hopped in as well. Two children grabbed his leg and propped it up. “Thank you,” he said. He tried it in Arabic, and they laughed but Rebkah’s daughter corrected him, and he repeated it. There was a call and then he almost toppled as the cart began to move. He couldn’t see much from the way he was laying in the cart but the jostling was not fun. One of the kids handed the coin back to him and they all moaned when he put it in his pocket. He decided to see if he could learn a little more so he held up some of the fabric of his trousers. “Trousers,” he said in English and Rebkah’s daughter replied. He repeated the word and smiled when she nodded that he was right.

He killed the time with the children by learning as much as he could. He didn’t know how much would stick but they seemed really happy to teach him. There were small breaks but they moved steadily until a different call. He looked around, “Tree. There is an actual tree.” He pointed. “Tree!”

A kid shouted the word back to him. 

It wasn’t a full oasis like you read about in stories with flying carpets but there was some scrub brush, and four trees. “Oh shade,” he moaned. It had been a day and the sun was already destroying his skin. He hopped off the cart and made his way over and sank down into the shade and could have wept. It felt so good. “Stupid English pastiness,” he said.

“Stupid English indeed,” Merlin agreed.

Eggsy looked over at him. “Shut it.”

“Very well.” Merlin agreed and sat next to him. Merlin handed him a damp rag and Eggsy lay it over his eyes. That felt so good. “I have some dates as well.”

“No moving, let me starve.” A piece of food brushed against his mouth, and Eggsy opened. “Chewy.”

“Not had a date before?”

“Oh, I’ve seen plenty a Saturday night on the town,” Eggsy joked. He smiled at the snort and swallowed. He opened his mouth, and another date was pressed to it. “No, not had one before.” He had dreams like this though. A handsome man, pampering him. If it was this hot though it was because they were by the water in like Bermuda or something. “How much water you wasting on me?”

“I can share my allotment,” Merlin replied. “I remember the green of the English countryside. It hurt my eyes, though not as much as I imagine your eyes are smarting.”

“I am in love with these trees. These trees are the best trees that have ever grown.”

“We stay here for a while, before it is our time at the great oasis.”

“Oh that sounds brilliant.”

“Many share it, many battles were waged before agreements were reached.” Eggsy could hear him chewing, and waited. “But most work together. Out here, it is how you survive.”

“Been in battle?”

“A few. And you?”

“Yeah, small and big. Been fighting my whole life.” Eggsy was glad his eyes were covered. “How it goes for some.”

“Aye,” Merlin agreed. “How fares the ankle?”

“Fine, I’m good. Heal quick.”

“And how fares the ankle?”

“Feels like shit, swear down I felt every bone rattle on that trip. It sucked. How did you survive?”

“On horse it is easier, I was one of the ones in the lead.”

“You like important here? Is dealing with me fucking up internal politics?” Eggsy was worried. The guy radiated power, but he couldn’t figure out what sort. He couldn’t figure the man out. Of course he also was trying to cope with stuck in a foreign land, with people who could barely understand him, over a century out of time. So it was understandable that the guy he had known for a day was a bit of an enigma.

“No, I am relied on, to read the stars, and I am good with horses, and in a fight. If my mother had not been so beloved, and my father relied on as he came to be, I would perhaps not have as good a place here. I am useful, and liked, and...understood. Other places I may not be so lucky.”

“Understood?” Eggsy asked hesitantly. He thought of their other conversation, what Merlin maybe hinted at. That maybe he was not het. “Who wouldn’t understand you?”

“Other tribes for being half Scottish. When the English see me they often just see the half Bedouin. And yes, I am one such as you. To prefer to bed men, when the rare opportunity arises.”

“That hard to get hard?” Eggsy tried to relieve the tension in the moment and immediately felt gross. “I’m sorry, that was stupid.”

“Many react with humour to awkward situations.” The cloth was lifted from Eggsy’s eyes. “You were in my tent, but if you prefer you can be moved to another space.”

“Your tent was pretty comfy, as these things go,” Eggsy said. “Not like you are going to ravage me just because we both like the D.”

“Quite. I would never ravish someone with an injury in fear of making it worse.” Eggsy looked at Merlin who moved to check his ankle. “You should rest while we work.”

“I should earn my keep.” Eggsy knew, from Dean, from Kingsman, if you didn’t make yourself useful, you would get fuck all.

“You are injured, rest. When you are capable we will figure out ways for you to help. For however long you are here.”

Eggsy nodded reluctantly and watched everything be put up. It wasn’t seamless, too many parts, but it was well organized and quicker than he expected. Which again, was silly because this was their lives. He could get into his Kingsman gear in ninety seconds. Rebkah came to him with a mug. “Goat milk.”

“It’s gross,” he groaned.

“Yes but so is dying of dehydration,” she pointed out. “You are good with children. You have some back home?”

“No,” he shrugged. “Sister. A lot younger than me. Watched over her until Mum moved them away.”

“You miss them.”

“Yeah,” he drank half the cup. “Ugh.”

“Merlin hates as well.”

“Well, nice to have something in common with someone.”

“You have much in common with him if you look,” she smiled at him. 

Eggsy ignored that, and finished the milk. “Can I get a branch from one of these trees, to help me hobble around a bit?”

Rebkah looked at the trees. “We guard them carefully. Only take when truly in need. I will talk to the men.”

Eggsy figured that meant a hell no. He stared out at the sand, but it didn’t move, no storm coming to take him back home. He was annoyed that he could feel himself drifting off. He had been sleeping so much since falling in time. Guess one hundred years plus wore you out. Also maybe he had had 4 hours sleep over five days coping with his mission. He fell asleep in the shade, but never all the way down, when he heard people approaching he snapped up. It was Merlin and a couple other men, carrying staffs, pieces of wood.

“We see if one of these works for you, and if not, then we will claim a piece of the tree,” Merlin explained.

“Really?”

“Of course, to not offer aid to one in need, is a cruelty,” Merlin explained.

Eggsy snorted. “Not my experience.”

“Your experiences now change,” Merlin said. The men all brought the wood forward and the third was a good height for Eggsy to lean on as he walked. “Good. Thank you Omar.” Merlin added a bit more in Arabic, and the other men nodded and headed back to camp. “Tonight, will you want to eat in the tent or with people?”

“With people,” Eggsy decided. He looked around. “Salim?”

“Aye?”

“How did I get here?”

“I found you, brought you. You forget this?” he was looking concerned.

“No, I know that. How did I get here, how do I get home?”

“This is unknown. Allah will show the way, when it is time. If it is time.”

“Don’t believe in god, sorry,” Eggsy said. “That make you hate me?”

“We are different men, with different views of the world. Why would that make me hate you?”

“Because -” Eggsy stopped himself. “I have no fucking clue to be honest. Guess just history of humanity?”

“That is a large thing. We are Merlin and Eggsy, a smaller thing. Are you a good man?”

“I try, but probably not.”

“All we can do is try,” Merlin gestured. “Come, Eggsy.”

Eggsy used the walking stick, and was able to make it to the centre of camp on his own, but he could feel Merlin hovering, ready to catch him. Eggsy realized two fucking days and he trusted that Merlin would catch him.

Apparently it wasn’t a scientific fact that all Merlin’s were dicks.

Eggsy couldn’t understand most of the conversation around him that night, though there words here and there. He did the slight of hand for the children again, and even a few adults applauded. Someone stood and juggled a few balls, and Rebkah found a hoop and moved it arm to arm in dizzying fashion. 

It was fun, Eggsy realized, as he was laughing and clapping when a man did a walking handstand. He couldn’t remember when he last had fun.

The food still was poor fare in comparison to a big mac, but he was growing used to it; he had always adjusted quickly. “You got any talents?” Eggsy asked as he leaned into Merlin.

“One or two,” Merlin replied. He smiled at Eggsy and stood. Eggsy watched everyone grow quiet and watch him. The children all moved closer. His voice started low and soft. Eggsy couldn’t understand a lick of it, but Merlin’s voice strengthened and it rose and fell on words. Poetry. He was reciting poetry. He began to gesture with the tale and everyone was listening rapt. Rebkah’s daughter climbed into his lap, and Eggsy loosely held her. When Merlin finished he gave a bow looking right and Eggsy and Eggsy nodded in return.

The girl in his lap and the other children got up and danced and were cheered on by the adults, and many broke out into song.

“You are smiling,” Merlin commented.

Eggsy watched the kids. “Yeah, well, this is nice.”

“It is,” Merlin agreed. “First night at a new camp is always a bit celebratory.”

Eggsy was able to pick up the chorus of the song easily, though he had no idea what the words meant and joined in. He could feel Merlin’s eyes on him but ignored that, happy to be singing. When the song ended he looked at the man again. “Wot?” Eggsy asked. “Not supposed to join in?”

“You are beautiful,” Merlin answered easily.

Eggsy flushed and looked around, but no one heard, or understood. “Okay, that is enough people for me. Which one is ours?”

“Fourth in the row on the right,” Merlin replied, and Eggsy waved him off. He needed some space. He went to the tent and pissed in the pot behind the curtain and saw that two pallets had been set up. He took the one more in from the opening so that Merlin wouldn’t have to climb over him. He was thinking too much to sleep, though he pretended when Merlin came in finally.

“Tomorrow we find you more clothes. You cannot keep wearing what you are. Beyond you’ll start to smell, they are not suited for the desert.”

“I’m asleep.”

“Of course you are.”

Eggsy listened to the man ready for bed. “Merlin?” he asked when the man was lying down as well.

“Aye?”

“Why is everyone so nice to me?”

“To be unkind to a lost man in need, is a sin,” Merlin said. “Why wouldn’t we help you?”

“Because I know many who wouldn’t.”

“And now you know many who would.”

“Merlin?” Eggsy took a deep breath. “Maybe you could ask your god, if maybe I could stick around for a while?”

“It will be in my calls to him,” Merlin replied.

“Thanks.” Eggsy yawned. “You are beautiful too,” he said and they were both quiet until they fell asleep.


	7. Chapter 7

“Merlin, I swear, if you ask one more time if I am sure I am up to helping, I will…” Eggsy had no idea how to finish that threat. “I’ll eat all the dates.” There, that should do it. His ankle was fine. Fine-ish. But if he stayed lazing about, he would lose his mind. Okay he hadn’t been lazing about. He had been using the walking stick to hobble around, learn the lay of the land. Which had been a bit of a mistake, as he somehow ended up milking a goat.

That had not been a thing on his bucket list.

But well, maybe one day he would be able to tell Daisy he had done that. She loved animals. More often than not he found himself with the children. A few had taken to following him around, and he did his few tricks under the shade of the trees, with the older ones continuing to teach him words. First handful of days, he knew eyes were on them, but soon, sooner than he would have trusted a stranger really, he was left alone with the children. Rebkah had also dropped a basket next to him three days ago.

“You are a tailor?”

“Well, I work in -”

“Mend, while you learn,” she said and went back to the camp. He shrugged. He wasn’t the best but he had stitched his arm once, and had actually hung out in the shop a fair bit. Watching Andrew was soothing. He began to sew, and he practiced learning colours with the children. A few women joined them, working on the rugs that the camp used for so many things, and were traded with other tribes, sold in the city.

But still that wasn’t helpful enough. And when a group were working on a cart that had clearly seen better days, Eggsy had gone over to help and was working with the main goat hoarder to brace the side. He knew Merlin would fuss, even though he hadn’t needed the walking stick for a couple days. Well day. And yeah he was feeling the strain. But he needed to be useful.

Merlin didn’t say anything, just added his shoulder and it lifted it enough that the wheel was able to be pulled off. When it was rested on supports, Eggsy stepped back, covered in more sweat than he should have been.

“Not a word,” Eggsy muttered.

He was relieved that Merlin didn’t say a thing as the man helped him to the trees. Eggsy rested his back against one, and sighed. “I swear I’m stronger than this. Ankle injuries just fuck you up.” He watched as Merlin checked the ankle and he had to wince at the press of fingers. “I’ve worked through worse.”

Still nothing, but Merlin nudged Eggsy until Eggsy was lying down. He turned Eggsy around, and Eggsy found himself with his head in Merlin’s lap, and his foot propped up on the tree, elevating the ankle. It wasn’t that swollen. 

Sure it was swollen, but not like the first couple days.  “Been ten days, bloody thing should be healed.”

“And your body was in good shape before it happened?”

There was his voice back. “Good enough. Bit tired. Bit worn.”

“So your body was a mirror of your soul.”

“Don’t, please?” Eggsy asked. He started to get up, even though he didn’t want to. They didn’t sleep close, a good metre between their pallets. But they talked, in whispers, far too late into the night. Eggsy answering questions about 2016, Merlin talking about his people. He had Merlin recite him more poetry, and he had sung a few times for him. Hours in the quiet of the night, learning about each other. Eggsy trying to figure out why he was there. He talked of ways to get home, mostly from what he remembered about movies with time travel. Merlin was fascinated by those.

He wondered if when they made it near Cairo, maybe movies would have reached the city. He would love to see Merlin seeing a movie for the first time. And a bath. He would fucking murder for a bath. Though, he wasn’t as gross as he expected. He got used to shitting in a hole in the ground and the clothes they wore did make a difference in comfort. He had even started wearing a head covering because it did make a difference. You used the sand to clean a lot, to scrub and mixed with some herbs even a bit pleasant scent. But still, a full bath, proper soak would be heaven. He had always preferred showers, but to just sit in water, feel it around him. Tepid, with oils and soft scents.

Again, maybe Cairo. He realized that he had let his mind wander. He liked that Merlin was okay with quiet. Eggsy hadn’t been. He always used to fill silence with words and jokes. But everyone was a bit quieter here. Everything was quieter here. He really wished that Merlin would stroke his hair. “I’m better,” Eggsy said softly. So, he still did fill silence. But it was more honest words than he ever used back home. “My heart hurts less.”

“Can you talk about it, them?”

“No, not yet,” Eggsy admitted. “And it all comes down to everyone was busy and important. Far more important than me. I asked too much of them.”

“You have asked for nothing since being with us. Are you so different in 2016?”

“Yeah. I guess.”

“What do you ask of these people, impossible things, like flying, and sending letters in an instant?”

Eggsy smiled at the tease in Merlin’s voice. He didn’t answer though, not for a while. “Rebkah will be bringing the mending over soon.”

“I can get her to stop.”

“I don’t mind,” Eggsy said; it was the truth. “It is a soothing task.”

“I have something I was working on. I could work next to you?”

“That would be good,” Eggsy agreed. Merlin eased Eggsy’s head off his lap, and Eggsy stayed laying on the scrub and sand, foot up. He probably shouldn’t have helped with the cart. He hoped that he hadn’t set himself back too much. Eggsy heard a few shouts and smiled. A boy squealed and landed on his chest, which made Eggsy groan. “Mohammed, you are fast, strong,” he said in Arabic. He was picking up words quickly from the children.

It was a bit ironic. In training he had had the second worst language tests, couldn’t pick up fuck all. Though having that fucker, Kingsman Merlin, constantly screaming at him in French, expecting somehow that would make Eggsy learn, didn’t help. But Arabic had been spoken by a lot of people at the council flats, and sure over a hundred years changed a language but still the melody of it, appealed, and the children were eager teachers.

In their nightly conversations Merlin also helped him.

Today they worked on food, and Merlin joined them a small box in hand. He lay down a piece of white cloth, and a few children moved closer to see what he was going to be doing. It was a compass...no...he wasn’t sure what it was.

“Astrolabe,” Merlin answered. “Navigation tool. There are more certain pieces of guidance than this, but it is a good back up. My mother gave to it to my father. It needs some love.” He was taking apart the layers and polishing them carefully.

“Neat,” Eggsy said. He was working on braiding cord. He had seen it on a few people. When his fingers faltered, the children guided him. “Braid?” he repeated from his lesson a few days ago. He got hugs when he remembered words. 

Seriously, positive reinforcement was a hell of a teaching tool.

It was a good afternoon, and Eggsy made it through the whole basket. The children were called back to the tents, and Eggsy scooted closer to Merlin. “It’s beautiful.”

He had no idea what any of it meant, but it was a lovely piece. Sort of thing that ends up in museums. “Teach me?” He watched the eager smile that grew over Merlin’s face, and listened as the man explained how to use the tool. In Merlin’s excitement, he sometimes flipped to Arabic and Eggsy understood more than he expected, and Merlin always corrected himself back to English and repeated it.

“I can show you tonight under the stars?” Merlin offered.

“It’s a date.”

“It is even Saturday, a night you date.”

“You remember a stupid joke I made over a week ago?” Eggsy shook his head. “Why are you paying attention like that?”

“Because you are worth paying attention to,” Merlin replied. He put away his work and gathered the basket. “I can return this to Rebkah. If you really want to do more work, you can help with the weapons chests. Knives and swords always need care.”

“You know, I think right now I am happy with the mending.”

“You are happy, aren’t you? It is a good look on you,” Merlin gave him a nod, and headed to the tents.

Eggsy sighed and flopped down. Fuck he wished he knew if Merlin was flirting, or just ready with a kind word. It was so hard to tell. There was little artifice in the way Merlin talked. With Kingsman, with spying, and codes, and that arsehole Kingsman Merlin, and before with Dean - every word could have five meanings behind it. His Merlin though, there was none of that. He didn’t need it.

He damn well knew Merlin had lied to him, about how everyone was happy that he was there. Some clearly were indifferent that he was there, ignored him. And he still had no clue if Merlin thought he was from 2016, or was like Rebkah and a few others who thought it was an odd delusion from hurting his head, and would pass eventually. But they were all obvious to him, with his training. And when Merlin paid him a compliment, he meant it. He wasn’t looking for something out of it. He just liked how the words made Eggsy feel.

Merlin wanted Eggsy to feel good.

And he was.

Eggsy realized, that he felt good, better than he had in a long time. Since that moment he realized that he had saved the world. That one moment where he was useful. Before everyone reminded him he was utterly forgettable.

He knew it was foolish to think, but he didn’t think Merlin would forget him, even if the sand came right now and took him home. 

Eggsy wanted that trip home less and less.

He slowly sat up and made his way to camp. The night passed quickly. He watched the call to prayer, he had been told he was welcome, but he could not fake an interest in god. But he liked watching others engage that way. He went to the tent and used the mix of sand and scrub to wipe down key areas and chewed a little bit of bark to clean his teeth.

Mouthwash was not what he expected to miss among the most but there that fact was. Merlin had three books in English. The complete Shakespeare, a British military guide, and a pulp novel. He was trying Shakespeare. Always hated it in school, but there was something to reading Shakespeare so far from home. When there wouldn’t be a test, when he could take his time with the words.

Merlin came into the tent and smiled. “Would you like to understand the heavens?”

“More to them than dreamt in my philosophy, I’ve been told,” Eggsy replied and put the book down. “The tragedies are balls. But I like the romances.”

“I do as well. And the histories,” Merlin held out his hand, and Eggsy took it. They walked a bit into the desert, a bit away from the fires of camp. 

Eggsy sat when Merlin nudged his shoulder and froze for a moment when Merlin wrapped himself around Eggsy, but there was no hug, or grope; no kiss on his nape. It was just the easiest way for Merlin to guide Eggsy’s hands, to show him how to use the tool.

He taught well, and Eggsy matched the tool to the stars. “So this would lead me home?”

“Ye could find England yes,” Merlin agreed.

“But not 2016.”

“No, it is a good tool, but contains no magic.”

“Why did your mother give it to your father?”

“He was technically a deserter,” Merlin said. “He disliked how the British were installing themselves in Egypt. His team were sent to the desert, to map. They found our tribe. And when the team went on, it seemed he had contracted a ‘fever’ and couldn’t travel. He just...stayed. A few years later, some people came for him, and he agreed to go, to keep our people safe. Mother gave that to him, to guide him home. It was two years. He wrote her letters from his cell. Countless letters. Then it was realized how much of the language he had picked up, dialects. He figured out some codes, only on the agreement, he would be allowed to go home. They complied, he could return to the tribe, so long as he would answer letters, translate. It takes a long time to be found in the desert. So he came home, guided by that. I didn’t remember him at all. I had been four when he left. He cried when he saw me.”

“So if he felt like that, why did he send you to school in England?” Eggsy couldn’t put those pieces together.

“He wanted me to be prepared, for the world. He knew that he could arm with me sword and rifle, but sometimes you need to be armed with words, as well. And who knows maybe he knew an Englishman would be with me one day. Mother always said, he was touched by destiny, just a little.” Merlin was quiet. Eggsy looked at the metal in his hands. “Do you need to be guided home to someone?”

“No, I think maybe I was already guided there.” Eggsy looked up at the stars. “They’d look the same. If I sat in this spot on the same day in 2016, they’d look the same. That’s pretty cool.”

“Cool is good, yes?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy agreed. He took a chance, and leaned back into Merlin. He waited for the man to flinch away, but he didn’t. Eggsy sank against him. “Your parents sound like a good love story.”

“It is one that has been told many times, to me. By them and others who watched them.”

“Would you tell it to me?”

“Her name was Jacinda, and she was beautiful, and kind, and was gifted with the horses. His name was Hamish McLullich, and he was a right pain in the arse.”

Eggsy barked out a laugh. Merlin’s arms wrapped around him as he told the story, a proper love story, a should be a movie love story, and Eggsy listened rapt. When it was done, Merlin’s cheek rested on Eggsy’s head. “You believe in love like that?” Eggsy whispered.

“Of course, I saw it, did I not?”

“No, I mean for you?”

“No,” Merlin admitted. “I hadn’t. Not with what I would ask for a partner.”

“Hadn’t.” Eggsy couldn’t shift, couldn’t look at him. “Not don’t.” Those were very different words. 

“We should return to our tent, it grows late,” Merlin said and stood. When Merlin went behind the curtain, Eggsy took a chance and moved his pallet, a hand’s width and not a metre between them.

Merlin didn’t comment as he lay down, and they looked at each other. “Do you believe in love like that, Eggsy?”

“I hadn’t,” Eggsy said quietly.

“Hadn’t, not don’t?” Merlin repeated Eggsy’s words back to him.

“Guess, guess we find out yeah?” Eggsy was hesitant. It had been less than two weeks, but more conversation than he had ever had with anyone he had been with before.

“May I kiss you, Eggsy?”

Eggsy just gave a small nod, and closed his eyes. They snapped open when a kiss was pressed to the back of his hand, and then to the palm. “What was that?”

“A kiss.” Merlin brushed a hand over Eggsy’s hair. “Goodnight, Eggsy.”

Eggsy caught Merlin’s hand before it returned to Merlin’s side, and copied the kisses. “Goodnight, Salim.”


	8. Chapter 8

He wouldn’t say time passed quickly, but it passed quicker than he expected, and it had been a couple months. There was routine, take care of the mending and the children, learn Arabic, help out when it is needed elsewhere - avoid the goats. Talk with Merlin at night, wish he felt comfortable enough to jump the man.

They now slept side by side, and more often than not Merlin’s arms were wrapped around him in the night. There were more of those hand kisses - Eggsy was becoming addicted to those kisses. There were squeezes of his shoulder, kisses to his nape, his forehead, and he had initiated a couple to Merlin’s mouth. Those had been great. Eggsy figured he could push and more would happen, but he didn’t. It was worry that maybe Merlin didn’t want that, want him the same way. Maybe gay in 1902 was different than 2016. Fuck he wished he had read more history. He also knew they didn’t have lube. Lots of delicious stuff could be done without it, but he didn’t know Merlin’s experience, and couldn’t quite initiate the conversation.

And a part of him liked that they were moving slowly. It was a new thing for him - he was pretty sure he was being romanced. Shown his value. He still hadn’t managed to tell Merlin what home was like for him, why he fell through time so worn down in body and soul. But he knew Merlin was trying to heal that.

Eggsy was healing himself too. He realized that okay, Kingsman Merlin was a dick and cruel and everything he did was bullshit, but Tilde had been a goddamn princess, future ruler of a country. He’d have hated being a consort. The way she dumped him, not great, but also she had been right to do it. Roxy was busy, almost double the missions of him, he couldn’t expect her to be around. And Harry, well Harry he couldn’t reconcile. That one hurt the most. But maybe he should have remembered how Harry had hurt him over the dog test, and not trusted him again. He honestly didn’t know.

Thinking about Harry just hurt, so he tried to not think of the man. And the more distance there was from 2016, the easier that was to do.  Not thinking about 2016 happened more every day. But he couldn’t excise it completely from his mind, it lingered there, just in the back, nudging at him, that this wasn’t really where he belonged. That this would end, because all good things did.

Eggsy tried not to think about that too.

They had settled in for the night, but Merlin wasn’t as calm as he usually was before bed. “Merlin?”

“Something,” he said. “A couple others are feeling it too.”

“Storm?” Eggsy worried. He used to be scared of snakes most of all, but desert storms had climbed to the top of the list.

“No,” Merlin was clearly frustrated. “A few could swear we saw something, but you cannot trust your eyes sometimes in the desert.”

“Mirages?”

“Aye,” Merlin sighed. “Distract me, Eggsy. Tell me a story.”

“What sort?”

“Romantic.” 

Eggsy smiled, Merlin always chose romantic. “Of course,” Eggsy briefly touched his jaw, and kissed his nose. “Once upon a time, there was a fierce ogre who lived in the forest.” He told Merlin the story of Shrek and Fiona, because why the fuck not?

They fell asleep, close as they always did and a couple hours later screams woke them up. Merlin rolled awake quickly, ran out of the tent. He came back in a moment later. “Raiders. Stay in here.” He went to his trunk and opened it up.

“Merlin, I can fight,” Eggsy said.

“This is not your battle.”

“Like fuck it isn’t. These are my people too,” he snapped, not realizing what he was saying, but if he had, he would have stood by the statement. “Tell me you have a gun in there.” Eggsy blinked as he was handed something. “Okay?” It was a rifle but not quite like what he was used to. Gun history was something he did know. “Bolt action?” he said looking at it. “Why not just give me a bow and arrow?”

“Ali has if you prefer.”

“No, give me the bullets,” Eggsy said, and a handful were dropped into his hands. He'd have to make the shots count, and fuck he’d lose two or three just figuring the fucker out. “What about you?” he asked, and watched Merlin pull out a fucking sword and dagger. “Okay then.”

Eggsy hurried out of the tent, saw Rebkah’s husband carrying their daughter. Eggsy knew where’d he be. “Give me her,” he shouted. “Where are the other children?” He slung the rifle over his shoulder, and took the girl who burrowed into his shoulder. Rebkah’s husband gestured and shouted, and then he was running along with Merlin.

Eggsy went in the direction the man had pointed, and found a woman running with her baby into one of the larger tents. Three men were there guarding the outside. He bent and went in. It took a moment to get the girl to let go. He saw the couple women in there armed as well. “Going to be fine,” he promised and sang the lullaby in Arabic that he had picked up. He couldn’t cover the screams and shouts from the camp, but it soothed a few of the children.

He stepped back outside. “What is it?” He loaded the rifle and cursed that he didn’t have pockets. A pouch was tossed to him and he put the spare bullets in it.

“They come for the goats, water. Godless, tribeless.”

“Lifeless, soon,” Eggsy swore. This was something Eggsy well understood, and could definitely help with. He saw a shadow moving. “There,” he whispered. “Ours?”

“We would not stalk like that,” he replied.

Eggsy pulled the bolt and took a deep breath. He shot, and the man fell. The weapon was kind of bullshitty but worked. But still, he felt the need to move. “You know how to use this thing?”

“Aye,” the man said. Eggsy would have smiled if he wasn’t distracted. He always enjoyed how many in the group said Aye, for yes, influenced by Merlin, by his father. Eggsy traded him the gun for his dagger, and ran to where he could hear lots of noise. There was a skirmish going on, his people barely dressed, or in sleep clothes, the raiders in dark fabric. Good, at least he knew he’d be attacking the right people. He saw a raider raise a sword, and charged forward in a football tackle, used the hilt of the dagger to knock the man out. He rolled up and blocked a sword that was coming down. 

Eggsy used momentum and fell back to the ground, tossed the man up and over his shoulder. He heard a cry and looked over and there was Merlin, with that sword. The curve of it, the stroke Merlin used, took the man’s head three quarters off. If he had let himself he could be very distracted by how fucking amazing Merlin looked in battle but more raiders were coming over the dunes. Eggsy focused and fought. Something wasn’t right. A forward assault...fuck someone was flanking. 

Eggsy ran through the tents and sure enough Ali and a couple were trying to fight 7 men coming for the horses. He shouted and threw his dagger, catching one in the throat. He dove in and pushed Ali; a sword that would have killed the man slashed across his torso. Eggsy cursed but kept fighting. Merlin had followed and they fought with the others, and it was over quickly. The few raiders left alive went running. Half a dozen men grabbed horses to give chase. “Go,” Eggsy urged him.

“You are bleeding.”

“Yeah, and those fuckers tried to mess with us. Go!” Eggsy pushed him, and Merlin went with the others. Eggsy took a look at the wound and fuck it probably needed some stitches but they needed to assess the damage, get rid of the bodies before the children saw. He ran to his tent and ripped up his head covering and tied it around the wound as best he could. It would do until it couldn’t. Adrenaline would get him through the next bit. He helped moved bodies over the next rise, but when he went to help bury them a bit, he couldn’t stop the noise of pain. Omar, Rebkah’s husband, looked at him and saw the blood. Eggsy definitely didn’t know the words he was saying, but he could get the gist. 

Eggsy was dragged back to the camp, and Rebkah cursed at him. “You fool,”

“Yeah, I know,” Eggsy said. “But I had to help.”

“Yes, bleed to death, and leave Merlin without his beloved, that is the good idea.”

“I’m not -” Eggsy tried to protest. Beloved was such a heavy word. A too huge word to be applied to Eggsy.

Rebkah pointed at a bench and Eggsy sat down. The cloth was stuck to the wound and she was clearly fretting at the thought of hurting him. Eggsy just ripped all the fabric away and cursed. So maybe that had been a bad idea. Rebkah had a bowl of water and pulled a rag out from it, and Eggsy saw it was already a bit bloody. “No, nope. Do not.”

“The wound needs cleaning,” she said.

“Yeah, and that is not clean.” Eggsy looked at her. “Blood can carry sickness you cannot see, don’t know about. Spread infection.”

“We have a paste to stop infection, is this not enough? It works well.”

“Better safe than sorry, yeah? Water has to be tossed once one person’s blood is in it. Sand scrub all bloody cloth, and then boil it in water for several minutes. And then toss that water too.”

“We waste so much?” Rebkah looked nervous.

“To keep people alive, yeah.”

Rebkah nodded, and dumped the water. Fresh water and cloth were brought and when she would have started cleaning the wound, they heard horses. Eggsy struggled to get up, but Rebkah moved in front him, holding the dagger he had dropped.

Eggsy tried to think when someone had defended him like that. It was difficult to come up with an answer. A call rang out, and it was their men. It was dark, but Eggsy could easily bit out Merlin.

“He will take care of you, I can attend to others.”

“Rebkah, why would you have defended me?”

“You are ours, we protect our family.”

“I’m not -” Eggsy bit his lip at the look she gave him. “Thank you, Rebkah.” She left him the water and cloth, and hurried to help others. They were trying to use as little water as possible, but Eggsy saw Rebkah spread the word and fuck, they were all listening to him, believed him just because he said. 

And that was the thing that he realized hurt most about Harry. Harry never listened to him, not really. Harry was so sure he was in the right, in his station that listening to Eggsy wasn’t going to bring anything of value to the table. Even after Eggsy had earned his place there. In watching everyone listen to him, the last of the hero worship he had for Harry died.

He took his bowl and cloth, and headed towards Merlin. “Now look before you yell at me - what the fuck happened to you?” Eggsy yelled.

“Broken nose,” Merlin said.

“No shit,” Eggsy looked at him. “We need to take care of you.”

“It has been snapped back into place. You look worse.”

“I took a sword to the side, no biggie,” Eggsy would have waved it off, but lifting his arm hurt too much. “Come on,” he said softly, and they went to their tent.

Eggsy separated out the water a bit and tore the cloth. He cleaned up Merlin’s face and was relieved that the break had been set well. “You are going to be breathing rough for a few days.”

“My nose was already not good, now you will flinch to look at me,” Merlin replied but he was smiling a little, Eggsy knew he was teasing.

“You know I think you are the most handsome man, in this century and the next,” Eggsy said. “I am in a lot of fucking pain,” he had to admit.

Merlin cleaned the wound, and went to his chest for a salve that kept infection away. He spread the salve over the long wound. “This needs closing in some spots.”

“Anyone here good with stitches?”

“You,” Merlin said. “A couple of the women. I have not, but I have steady hands.”

“We can’t ask for more water to boil the needle and thread.”

“I have something that can clean them.” Merlin went to his chest and pulled out a small bottle. “Allah forgives a little medicinal care. Plus my father could not live without a touch of whisky.”

Eggsy snorted a bit. There wasn’t much in the bottle. “It high enough proof to kill any bacteria?”

“It is high enough proof to kill anything,” Merlin’s voice was drier than the sand around them. “I will get what you need, and one of the women.”

“No, you. I trust you.”

Merlin nodded and disappeared. The salve had stung but now was numbing the area which was good. It was going to leave a nasty scar no matter what. He sat there and breathed slowly, deeply, readying himself. Merlin returned with the thread and needles. “The camp lost very little. A couple goats, one tent is ruined. A few other injuries, but it is a battle we clearly won.”

“Happen a lot?”

“No,” Merlin replied. “It is very rare, but sometimes men are fools.”

“I fucking hear that,” Eggsy replied. The needle and thread were put in the whisky and Merlin washed his hands in it as well. Eggsy really hoped that this would not kill him. He took a few more breaths and looked at as much of the wound as he could, the tail of it wrapped around his back. The top half was fine but the sword had dug in as it went. “You need to wash the area with the whisky too. Salve good, but let’s add a little extra security.”

He was grateful that Merlin didn’t try to protest or warn him about the pain, almost the last of the whisky was poured on his side and back and Eggsy could not hold back the shout of pain. Merlin handed him the bottle, and Eggsy drank the couple shots worth that were in there. “Pinch the skin together, don’t make the needle and thread do all the work.”

“You have done this before?”

“My stepda, he...well you go to the hospital they are likely to file a child abuse report.” Eggsy kept his breathing slow, hissed when the needle pierced his skin.

“He hurt you.”

“Sure, but I lived.” Eggsy was gripping the fabric of his trousers to not reach out, smack Merlin away for hurting him. “He just...he wasn’t the reason, for how I was when I arrived.”

“This is when you decide to tell me?” Merlin asked.

Eggsy was quiet for a couple more stitches. “Already in pain, might as well roll with it. It’s time I told you about Harry fucking Hart.” Words that Eggsy didn’t even know were bottled up poured out of him. He was so focused on the storm that he was releasing, he barely felt the four more stitches that went in, or Merlin wrapping the wound. He just lanced the infection that he had been carrying in his heart, until there were no more words left to say. 

“You love him,” Merlin’s voice was quiet, sad.

“No, not the way I love -” Eggsy cut himself off. He looked at Merlin. “I feel a lot of things about Harry. But they are very different than the things I feel about you. For you. He, how I loved him was never romantic. He and I were not lovers. Maybe I had a crush? But it was mixed up in a million things. And he would have never been interested in me that way.”

“Did he not have eyes, or not the same preferences?”

“Not posh enough,” Eggsy said. “Men like him, don’t go for a bit of rough.”

“I dislike him,” Merlin said. “You are not rough. You are kind, and clever, and loyal, and utterly magnificent.”

Eggsy would have protested, he was used to denying it when anyone said something good about him. Deflected. But he looked at Merlin. “Yeah, I matter don’t I?”

“More than I can ever say.”

Eggsy looked at Merlin and pressed a gentle kiss to his jaw. “Rebkah called me your beloved.” A kiss to the other side. “Am I?”

“Yes,” Merlin whispered. “If you want.”

Eggsy kissed his lips, mindful of Merlin’s nose. “I want, beloved.” 


	9. Chapter 9

“Ali, not that the goats aren't great, but can I go back to my tent now?” Ali had cornered Eggsy a little bit ago and was talking about the goat hoard and upcoming breeding - in detail. Great detail, and asking about Eggsy’s goats back home. Eggsy had explained he didn’t have goats, which Ali damn well knew, everyone in the camp knew he was a tailor, only the man was disappointed, said something about what dowry would Eggsy have then. Which Eggsy was not going to go near as a topic. But he also then realized that Ali had said the same thing for the third time. “Ali, for the love of Allah, we move again in the morning, yeah? And I’m shite on a horse which we learned move before last and last move the women in the caravan hijacked me from the kids and tried to keep put henna on me, which looks gorgeous sure, but they want to put in places I don’t want paint. So please let me go to my tent and get rest before tomorrow?”

Ali looked up at the stars and the moon. “Let me just tell you about Merlin’s favourite goat.”

“Merlin’s favourite goat is whichever one has been roasted for supper,” Eggsy replied, and clapped Ali on the shoulder. “Goodnight, bruv.” Eggsy tried to keep the slang down, not to change how language worked, but it was hard. Maybe a dozen people in the tribe spoke English decently, and he mostly spoke Arabic these days, but with the ones who did speak English he indulged himself. He hoped to keep up the Arabic if he went home.

When he went home.

When. If. If When.

There had been no hint of a storm like the one that had brought him there, not in the five months that he had been there. But he didn't trust that this was his life, until the end. Because there was always a price for this much happy. And he was sure the price was going home. A when. But he tried to focus on If.

He liked the word if, far more than he did when.

He headed towards their tent and swore everyone was determined to stop him from reaching it. He was stopped three different times, the last being Rebkah, who had that look in her eyes. That look had the henna in wrong places, and had him learning a few belly dancing moves in secret. Which fucking hell forget crunches or the plank, that was an ab workout. He tried to step but but there was that determined glint in eye, small, fierce. Rebkah pulled him into her tent and began to strip him down. “Oi, I know your husband would not approve. I don’t know if I approve." Eggsy tried to slap her hands away, and she just slapped him back.

“This is why his sister distracts him. You cannot go to your tent in that. It has goat piss on it.”

“Yeah, why I was going to take it off in my tent. Where I was going?” Eggsy quickly covered himself, as somehow her stupid fast fingers had him completely naked. “Your husband is going to murder me.”

“He wants Merlin happy, as I do. He is good to us. You are good to us. And my husband knows you do not lust for me.” Rebkah held out a clean robe. White like most were, but thin, even in the dim light he could see her hands through it.

“Rebkah, that is an over layer. A fancy one.”

“It is for wedding nights, usually, but all I have that will fit you. You go two tents over, you’ll be fine.” She put it on his shoulders and smiled. She picked up a length of black cloth and belted the robe around his waist. She then put over his shoulders a mantle, embroidered, beautiful.  “Yes, good.” She stood on her toes, and kissed his cheek. “May I put bells on your ankle?’

“To go to my tent. To sleep, because we move tomorrow? No, you may not put bells on my ankle. I’m going.” He reached down to pick up his clothes, and she kicked him. “What the fuck, Rebkah?”

“No touching the goat piss clothes. You get them back tomorrow. What are you still doing here when you need sleep? Go, go with you, away now.” Just as he had been dragged into the tent, he was pushed out. Luckily it was quiet,and no one saw him going to his tent, which was good, because what Rebkah had put him in hid...not a fucking thing. He opened the flap to his tent and froze. 

Merlin was kneeling in the middle of his tent, an oil lamp lit low. There were extra pillows spread about and the more carpets than usual covering the ground. Merlin’s head was uncovered and he was only wearing the flowing trousers that somehow emphasized just how fit he was. “I see my request to delay you worked. And that you were delayed in interesting ways.” Merlin was looking him up and down. “You wear wedding night clothes.”

“What Rebkah said,” Eggsy looked at him. “Is that what this is?” He paled, and then flushed at the thought.

“Marriage between men is a forbidden thing.”

“Remember? Not when I am from. Well when and where. This area not so awesome on the gay rights.”

“You can wed another man? You told me this in passion, in anger. I thought maybe it a lie.”

“I could,” Eggsy knelt next to Merlin. 

“But you hadn't? You said you left no one behind, but I need to know truly, Eggsy. Is there someone there? That you miss, that you wish to return to?” 

“No. I would not have called you my beloved, lain next to you with my heart in your hands, if there was anyone back home I was promised to.” The small chest Merlin had procured for Eggsy was even covered with a carpet, a coveted pitcher of water and bowl with towel waiting. 

“Why not? You are lovely. Smart, kind. Handsome. A good man. What mother would not love that, even if you are a dreadful heathen.” Merlin’s smile showed the teasing in the word. 

“Don’t want to talk about that,” Eggsy said, Merlin knew the truth of him, and he knew Merlin was just delaying whatever it was he wanted to say. Eggsy desperately wanted those words. “Want to talk about all this. And how you asked people to delay me? And how I ended up in this?” He gestured to his thin robe.

“To wed is forbidden. There is no one I could ask for you, for your hand. Outside our tribe, things would not go well for us. But my mother was greatly respected and my father was accepted because of what he gave up for us. You fought with us against those raiders, you spilled blood to keep our supplies safe. You are welcome with us. However long you want.”

“I know, I remember the party.” Allah might forbid alcohol, but apparently exceptions were occasionally made when you went to battle. He had been so long without alcohol, he had gotten completely blitzed. 

Merlin smiled, “You danced with the women. It was very impressive.” He reached over and slid a cloth off his chest, showing a plate with dried fruit and nuts. He picked up a piece and held it out to Eggsy. Eggsy reached to take it, but Merlin pulled it away a bit. Eggsy put his hand down and opened his mouth. The apricot was sweet against his tongue, Merlin’s fingers rough against his lip. He licked the fingers that lingered. “I would ask you now, be mine.”

“Merlin,” Eggsy looked at him. “Merlin we don’t know if I can stay, what if…”

“And what if?” Merlin countered. “What if we wait, and wait, wait to be sure, and waste time? Eggsy, Allah sent you to me. And I will not deny the gift. If I am wanted.”

“You are wanted. So very wanted,” Eggsy said. He would have kissed Merlin, but more fruit was pressed to his mouth. He chewed and reached to the plate, and fed a nut to Merlin. “I’ve never wanted like I want you. But this will only break our hearts.”

“To not have you, to not love you, that would break it more. You may be taken away from me tomorrow, or you may be here until I die. Should I live those days in fear, deny what I feel for you?” Merlin moved closer and cupped Eggsy’s face. “I am yours, Eggsy. Now. Tomorrow. Forever from my time, through yours. Beloved."

“That’s a lot of time,” Eggsy whispered. He closed his eyes. He couldn’t look at Merlin.

“Not nearly enough,” Merlin promised, and kissed the closed lids. Eggsy felt the lips against his nose, his jaw and finally his lips. A soft brush, all promise, no heat, not yet. “A dozen lifetimes would not be enough.”

“Merlin, please.”

“Please what, my love?”

“Ask me to stay?” Eggsy opened his eyes. Fuck When. Fuck If. He was staying, if Merlin just asked. If.

“Stay. Stay with me. Please.”

Eggsy pressed his forehead against Merlin’s. “I will.” He wanted to believe it. That he could stay, no matter that his life never worked in his own favour. Tonight he would believe it. “I fucking love you.”

“In your time, is love a curse?”

“Suppose to some,” Eggsy said. “Doesn’t feel like a curse right now.” He looked at the chest. “What is the water for?”

Merlin smiled. “For me,” he said, and kissed against another of those soft brushes.

“Thirsty?” 

“No,” Merlin replied, and poured a bit out. He put the small towel in it, then wrung it out. He looked at Eggsy. “Beautiful,” he said.

“You can see my junk in this, it is so thin.”

“I will have to give Rebkah a fine gift in thanks,” Merlin said. “Lay against the pillows.” 

“I can do that,” Eggsy agreed, and hastily stretched out. The romance was all well and good, but he knew what came next - hopefully him. Months they had been together, but still moved things slowly.  Eggsy figured they had been waiting for this moment. Merlin brought the bowl of water next to him, undid the belt, and spread Eggsy’s mantle and robe open. He began to bathe Eggsy, the water was tepid, but so cool against Eggsy’s skin. He was never going to get used to the heat of the day. “That feels nice,” he managed to say on a sigh.

“You are so desperate for water.”

“Have twenty minutes showers some days.”

“How much water do you have?” Merlin clearly couldn’t fathom that.

“I waste a lot,” Eggsy admitted. “But you’d like it, me wet head to toe?”

“A sight I would cherish,” Merlin agreed. The towel was soaked again and the strokes continued down to Eggsy’s cock. “May I?”

“You may whatever the fuck you want,” Eggsy said. He couldn’t understand why Merlin wasn’t dicking him down yet. And then he realized that it was 1902, he sometimes forgot, which was a crazy thing, but then it was all crazy. Maybe Merlin didn’t know what to do, how to go about this. “Umm, Merlin?” For a moment Eggsy forgot how to think as the cloth swept over his cock. “Oh that feels good.” He couldn’t stop the whine that came out when Merlin moved down to his thighs. When Merlin nudged he spread his legs a little more apart and the cloth traveled up his thigh, stroked against his balls and then down the other thigh. “Merlin...I need to explain how men fuck.”

“Eggsy, I am sorry but I am not going to fuck you,” Merlin sneered a little. 

Eggsy went from a good cool feeling, to frigid in his soul at the face Merlin was making. “Why because it is a sin?” Thoughts of the beatings Dean and his goons doled out, flashed in his mind and he started to push away.

“No because you are not trash I slake my thirst on and forget the next day. You are my heart, my dreams, my everything. I will nae fuck you. I will make love with you this night. Give my body to  you, worship you, show you my promise to adore your for as long as there is breath in my lungs.”

“Oh,” Eggsy had to close his eyes again. To have that much sincerity focused on him, hurt. Made him realize how no one, not a single soul in his life had ever looked at him the way Merlin did. “So you have before ummm…”

“My cock has been in an arse, yes,” Merlin said, and there was laughter in his voice. Eggsy through an arm over his eyes, the robe sleeve thankfully covering most of his face. 

“Just, you need to go really slow,” Eggsy said, they were going to have to make do with spit and that was unpleasant but manageable.

“There will be nothing fast about tonight,” Merlin was even washing his toes, which made him giggle. Merlin runs the wet towel all over the exposed skin again, but when he goes to take the robe off, Eggsy shook his head. “Eggsy?”

“I like how it feels against me, all soft.”

“Very well.” Merlin moved the bowl back to the chest and stood up in the tent. He had to keep his head bowed a bit, and Eggsy took the time to admire the ropes of muscles, the lean strength in him. He watched Merlin quickly wipe himself down as well, and then he took the trousers off and Eggsy groaned.

“Look at you. Fucking fit or what?”

“Fit?”

“You have a good body,” Eggsy said. He looked him up and down. “And a great dick.” Merlin had generally in all their months together even in a small space, managed to keep his body hidden. 

“This is a good compliment in your time?” Merlin blinked. 

“Not one you say outside a situation like this.” Eggsy held up a hand and Merlin took it, and then he had the whole weight of the man on top of him. “That feels good.” He loved being pressed down by someone else’s weight. Merlin stretched Eggsy’s arms above his head, and that felt even better. “A kiss would be good?”

Merlin’s lips pressed against his, this time a proper kiss. They were firm, pressing, but not biting like a few blokes he had known. Merlin’s lips were dry, like everything was around here, but this was a good dry, and when Eggsy opened his mouth, Merlin pressed his tongue in, but never choked him. The kisses seemed to last forever. Eggsy wasn’t sure he had ever kissed this much. He wondered if Merlin was trying to delay the good part. “You can get on with it, you know.”

“I am getting on with it,” Merlin answered, and Eggsy figured his dick would get a few tugs, but no, it was just kisses against his jaw and neck. He had known he had a sensitive neck, the Kingsman tie always choked him, but he hadn’t quite realized the benefits of a sensitive neck before. He was getting hard just from the weight of Merlin against him, and kisses on his neck.

“Can I have a thousand of those?” Eggsy begged. Each press of lip, and lick against his neck was making his head swim. “Two thousand?” he changed his mind when teeth grazed his adam’s apple. “Salim. You are breaking me apart here.”

“I’ll hold ye together.” Merlin moved down his body and Eggsy moaned when a tongue flicked his nipple, and the cold air was blown against it. 

“This that worshiping thing you mentioned?” Eggsy’s voice was husky, a whisper; he couldn’t get it to pitch any louder even if he wanted to.

“It is. Your wedding vows say that, with my body I will worship thee. Always liked the sound of that.”

“They really don’t,” Eggsy said.

“Father said it was a Scottish thing, assumed maybe it was everywhere there.”

“English bit too repressed for that,” Eggsy arched when there was a nip against his ribs. “Fuck, babe.”

“Worship,” Merlin reminded him. He kept his journey south slow, licking and kissing. Eggsy giggled when his belly button was kissed, which made Merlin do it again. Laughing during sex was nice. He wondered if Merlin was doing all this to have him mellow for when he had to fuck him almost dry. Unfortunately that thought tensed him up again. “My love?” Merlin asked.

“Nothing,” Eggsy said, and sank back into the pillows. “Just thinking about what is next.”

“Mmmm so am I,” Merlin ran his nose along Eggsy’s hip. “Do you like a mouth on your cock?”

Eggsy had given so many damn blow jobs, during the years he didn’t care to think about. He had had maybe a dozen given to him. “Yeah, but you don’t have to.” Merlin was already giving him so much, felt wrong to ask for more.

“Oh but I want to,” Merlin said, and he gave gentle kisses along Eggsy’s half hard cock until he reached the tip and gave a lick to the slit. He looked up at Eggsy, eyes both shadowed and bright. “Ye have a great dick.”

Eggsy started to laugh, and it was quickly turned into a moan as Merlin’s mouth sank down his length. He waited and Merlin just stayed there, the weight of Eggsy against his tongue and the warmth, the wet was so damn perfect. He could live with the dry of the desert with the promise of Merlin’s mouth. When Merlin pulled back up, he shivered. Eggsy spread his legs more to make room for Merlin and did his best to stop thinking, to just enjoy. Merlin made that easy because nothing had ever felt better than this. He kept a steady pace, arousing, but not trying to bring Eggsy off. 

“You are going to kill me here, Salim.”

“No, you’ll live,” Merlin said after he pulled off. “Under the pillow to your left.” His hand stroked Eggsy’s cock while he waited. A firm touch, but still not rushed. “Please.”

Eggsy was so damn languid that moving his arm that little bit seemed like work, but he stretched his arm over and felt something round under the pillow. He pulled out a jar, the label scraped and scratched, but legible. “Oh.”

“I will never hurt you,” Merlin said. “Had to trade Ali a dagger, and some dried dates to get that.”

Eggsy had to wipe a tear away, and handed the vaseline to Merlin. “No matter what happens to us. I’m yours. Yeah?” Maybe they’d get to keep this, maybe they wouldn’t, but he could not fuck anyone else after this.

Merlin moved back up Eggsy’s body to kiss him. “Aye. And I am yours. No matter what.” He took the jar from Eggsy. “Now where was I?”

“Hopefully about to use that?”

“Mmmm,” Merlin replied. He sat up between Eggsy’s legs, spread them wider apart. Eggsy wiggled and put one of the pillows under his arse. “Well, I don’t think I’ll be returning that one to its original owner.”

Eggsy snickered a bit and watched Merlin open the jar. “Been a bit,” he told Merlin.

“Oh?”

“Hundred years at least.” Eggsy grinned and winked at Merlin, and loved the way the laugh moved Merlin’s body. “Hey, do I get to touch you at all?” He wanted to get his hands on those lean muscles.

“This is about pleasing you,” Merlin said.

“Yeah, and touching you would please me,” Eggsy said. “Your dick is so long and pretty. Wanna touch.”

Merlin put the jar aside for the moment, and held out his hand to Eggsy. Eggsy was pulled up and he wrapped his arms tight around Merlin’s neck. Hugged him close and the robe fabric fell against them both. Eggsy dropped kisses on Merlin’s shoulder. “You have a couple freckles,” Eggsy kissed each one. He dragged his hand down Merlin’s stomach. “Know a few blokes who spend hours at the gym and aren’t as ripped as you.” He knew Merlin was about to ask what a gym was, and decided he didn’t want to answer so grazed a finger against Merlin’s cock to distract him. It definitely worked the way that Merlin gasped. He did it again, just to tease, figuring it was fair after everything Merlin had been doing to him. Eggsy liked the way that Merlin was clearly struggling to stay still, to let Eggsy do what he wanted.

Eggsy kissed him, a hungry desperate thing, he was so hungry for the man but kept his touch soft, gentle.

“Eggsy,” Merlin pulled back. “You tease.” His voice was filled with affection, and Eggsy smirked.

“Oh? What were you doing?”

“Worshiping, remember?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy began to touch Merlin’s cock in earnest, stroking the length, loving how it filled in his hand. “This is going to feel fantastic.”

“It is feeling fucking spectacular already,” Merlin said. He moaned, and bit at Eggsy’s shoulder. “You have very clever fingers, Eggsy.”

“You have no idea,” Eggsy replied. He squeezed Merlin’s cock and leaned into his body. He whispered into Merlin’s ear. “Would you like to see how clever, Salim?” Eggsy nipped at his earlobe and the way Merlin growled sent heat straight to his cock.

“I do believe I would,” Merlin agreed. 

Eggsy slid away from Merlin and lay back down. He picked up the jar and opened it. It was only about 2/3rd full. “You traded that much for not even a full jar?”

“I would nae hurt you. The price was fair.”

“Merlin,” Eggsy sighed. “You think too much of me.”

“No, I think of you a reasonable amount, you just are unaccustomed to being valued.” Merlin settled in between Eggsy’s legs as he had before. “You are thinking too much. Show me how clever your fingers are.”

Eggsy coated a finger, and spread his legs to just the edge of comfort. He smiled up at Merlin. “Ready for the show?” Merlin just gave a solemn nod and Eggsy began to circle the finger around his hole and then pressed in a bit. He automatically slid into show mode, making it a performance for Merlin, adding in extra moans and gasps as he stretched himself out. He let his head fall back and closed his eyes. People don’t like it when you make eye contact.

Merlin’s hands were hot on his thighs. “Slower, Eggsy. Sound like yourself. Enjoy it for you, not for me, my love.”

“But want you to enjoy,” Eggsy whined. “Want to be gorgeous for you.”

“You are,” Merlin promised, and his hands ran up and down Eggsy’s thighs. “You deepen my faith, in a god that loves us, bringing me such beauty as you. Slow, the caravan doesn’t move to the dawn, we have time.”

Eggsy relaxed into the carpets and pillows. He sighed instead of moaned, moved his legs to a more comfortable angle. He put on foot on Merlin’s thigh, ran his toes against Merlin’s cock. Merlin’s startled laugh, made Eggsy smile. He pressed his finger in and out of himself, slowly, enjoying the sensation. When he added a second finger, he didn’t try to rush the stretch like he usually did. He took his time like Merlin wanted. 

Fucking hell, like he wanted.

“Such a bounty, lain before me,” Merlin murmured, “I will never fill.”

“Might.”

“No, this is an endless feast, that I will never grow weary of.” Merlin brought Eggsy’s foot to his mouth, and kissed his ankle before putting it back down.

Eggsy kept pushing the two fingers in and out of himself, and began to stroke his cock as well. “You too,” he pleaded.

“That I stroke myself, or add my hand to yours?”

Oh that was a hard choice. Bugger. He snorted a little as buggering was what this was all about. “Stroke yourself,” Eggsy finally decided. He had a thought. “Merlin when was the last time you did this?”

“Three years,” he was able to say after thinking. “Partners are difficult to find.”

Well if the guy had more than herpes, three years, he’d probably know or be dead, so Eggsy figured the risk was worth it.  And Merlin, he was beginning to realize, was worth anything. Everything. Not the wisest thought he’d ever had, but he had never been a very wise man. He spread his fingers a bit more as they pushed in and out, stretching himself. Merlin touched himself easily, casually, his eyes never taking their gaze off Eggsy’s fingers. 

Eggsy cursed as he pressed against his prostate. “Fuck,” he groaned. 

“A lovely show, but I have to admit my patience is as thin as yours was at the start,” Merlin moved closer. “Are ye ready?” 

“Yeah,” Eggsy agreed, and pulled out his fingers. He coated Merlin’s cock in the vaseline, and wrapped his legs around Merlin’s waist. “Slow?”

“Of course,” Merlin promised and didn’t push in, because of course he didn’t. There were soft kisses and nuzzles and words in Arabic that Eggsy knew most of, but not all; he knew though that they were romantic. Merlin’s hands were on his hips and were shifting him, Eggsy went where he wanted which was just a bit higher on the pillow. He felt Merlin’s cock press against his hole and arched up a little. “Slow,” Merlin chided.

“Don’t see me rolling us over and sinking down on you, do you?” Eggsy said.

“You think ye could move me?” Merlin’s smile was the sharpest it had been that night.

“Oh we’re playing that game another night,” Eggsy said with a sharp smile of his own.

Merlin started to press into him and it was that perfect place where he felt it, almost uncomfortable but not pain. Eggsy lay there, just waited while Merlin sank all the way in, and pulled him as close as he could. There were more kisses and the hands on his hips squeezed, anchored him. Merlin began to move, but it stayed at the slow pace the whole night had been.

Eggsy wasn’t sure he could handle being worshiped like this all the time, but for tonight it was good.

It was perfect.

Merlin’s cock pressed against his prostate, and the moan that was wrenched from Eggsy was completely authentic. “Like that,” Eggsy gasped out, “Salim, please. I need you. All of you. Everything. Please.”

That seemed to be the thing that finally snapped Merlin’s patience and the thrusts changed. He never hurt Eggsy, because Eggsy thought Merlin never would, but the pace quickened, the hands on his hips gripped tight. All that controlled strength was unleashed, and focused on making Eggsy feel good.

Eggsy felt like he would fucking take flight. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Merlin, your cock feels so good. Fuck, you fill me perfect. Need you to come in me, need to feel you in me for as long as I can. There, right there,” he begged. Merlin was responding in a mix of English, German, and Arabic, and the pace grew faster and Eggsy’s legs were wrapped so tight around Merlin, he wondered how the man was even moving. 

The pressure was building in his spine and he had never come from just being fucked, but Merlin was making him see stars. He knew Merlin was getting close too, the way the man’s breath was falling from his lips, the way the rhythm was faltering just a little. Eggsy dragged his nails over Merlin’s skin, and Merlin’s teeth sank into his shoulder and the man went rigid. He kept pumping though clearly spent and Merlin made a little space between their bodies. He pressed his thumb against the slit in Eggsy’s cock, and then not even five strokes later, Eggsy was coming all over Merlin’s hand. 

Eggsy’s legs fell from Merlin, all his muscles completely turned to liquid. “Fwar? Bwah? Mwah?” were the noises that spilled from Eggsy’s mouth. They may have been attempts at words, he wasn’t sure. His brain wasn’t exactly online at the moment. He closed his eyes and drifted. He felt that towel with the water brush all over his skin again.

Worshiped, definitely had a lot to recommend it. The robe was finally pulled off him and then he was gathered in Merlin’s arms and a blanket pulled over them. Merlin was whispering to him, promises Eggsy thought, praise, based on the tenor even if he only caught a few of the words. He brought Merlin’s hand to his mouth and kissed the palm.

“I’ve been with a lot of people. Girls and blokes, never been like this before.”

“Forgive me, but for all the freedom your time has, has it made people bad lovers?” Merlin kissed his shoulder. “Have none pleasured you?”

“Course they have, gotten off loads,” Eggsy snuggled into Merlin’s embrace. “But...just...nothing like this. Nothing like you. Didn’t even know that was an option.”

“Who could look at you and not want to give you everything?” Merlin asked.

Eggsy was quiet for a bit. This would be a stupid fucking time to say anything. “Guys who were looking to slake their thirst, like you said.” Oh look he said something. “Paid pretty well to drink, when I was younger.” And he said more. He waited for Merlin to pull away. A man with such a fierce code of ethics, as noble as Merlin, no way would he stay.

But Merlin’s arms just tightened around him. “You are not allowed to go back to your time.”

“What?”

“You are not beloved then. Honoured for the soul you carry. They do not deserve you. Allah sent you here, to show you your value, to bring you love. The love you should have always had, and that will not be taken away from you.”

“There was good sex in there too,” Eggsy told him. “Just never had a relationship like this. Never...ugh it sounds so corny. But yeah, never made love before.” Eggsy knew his tears were falling against Merlin’s skin, but he didn’t wipe them away. He just kissed Merlin’s palm again. “Salim, I am yours. No matter what, never going to be anyone else’s.”

“You know you have my heart. My body. My soul.”

“Isn’t that blasphemous?” Eggsy teased, wanting to lighten the mood.

“He will forgive me this, I think,” Merlin replied. He dropped a kiss onto Eggsy’s head. “You will be sore tomorrow for the ride.”

“I can cope with sore.”

“You could ride with me.”

“Could I?” 

“Aye,” Merlin promised.

“For as long as I can stay, I am staying,” Eggsy promised him. He refused to think about what that meant. Not tonight. Tonight there were just the arms around him, and the promises they made each other.


	10. Chapter 10

Morning came too damn quickly for Eggsy’s liking. “No,” he whined and pulled Merlin close. “Not time to pack up.” Merlin chuckled against his cheek, and he was hard against Eggsy. 

“No, it is not yet time to pack up,” Merlin replied.

Oh hell no, “then why am I awake?” Eggsy burrowed deeper into the pillows, but stopped when Merlin’s hand wrapped around his cock. “Well, now, perhaps mornings aren’t completely dreadful.”

“I thought I’d put you in a good mood for the pack up,” Merlin whispered against him, and kissed his neck. “Don’t want to make you uncomfortable for the journey but there are many ways to enjoy each other, are there not?” His hand began to stroke and Eggsy arched into the touch.

“Many, many, oodles and oodles,” Eggsy gasped. “I love mornings.” He turned in Merlin’s arms and they brought each other off with their hands, and Eggsy was in a pretty jaunty mood when the call for morning prayers came. He packed while Merlin did that and then they took the tent down, and brought the fabric to the caravan. 

Rebkah looked at him. “Will you ride with us?” She grinned at him and Eggsy waited, because he knew damn well she would ask. “Did Merlin enjoy the robe?” There was an actual eyebrow wiggle, and Eggsy laughed.

“Perhaps,” Eggsy said casually. “Next time, bloody toss me down and  just strap the bells to my ankle okay?” He gave her a wink, and enjoyed her laugh. “And Merlin said I can ride with him. Which I will, because I know, magically there will be no room with the children, and I will end up with certain women, and you lot will ask way too many questions I do not want to answer.”

“We would never, that would be wrong, to talk of such.” Rebkah tried to look holy and innocent. “We would never intrude on your personal life.”

“Right,” Eggsy snorted and helped the packing up some more, before going to find Merlin. He was already on his horse and Eggsy really wished he could have a photo of that. “Hey, got room for one more up there?” 

“I do,” Merlin leaned down, “Do you trust me?”

Eggsy blinked. “Holy shit, this is my crush when I was a kid come to life. Always liked Aladdin more than Jasmine.”

“The story of Aladdin lives in your time?”

Eggsy nodded. He took Merlin’s hand, and was pulled up. He winced a bit as he settled in behind Merlin. But the pain was mild for now. “Yeah, it gets retold a lot. Been a few brilliant versions.”

“It is good that stories live on.” Merlin started them at a walk. “You will be pleased, we head to an oasis.”

“Water?”

“Aye, and it has two pools, one of which we swim in.”

“Fuck, that almost made me come,” Eggsy groaned. He had kept clean, Merlin had taught him how, but there had only been a couple of full immersion in water chances since arriving here. “A proper swim?” He squeezed Merlin tight.

“Aye, though we bathe with the women and not men.”

“But do not gaze on, blah blah blah.”

“Yes, but since I am not attracted to women, apparently it is the better option. I might be overcome with lust for Elijah’s body.”

“Ew,” Eggsy shuddered a bit.

“Indeed.”

“Ummm Rebkah and a few of the other women know I like women and men?”

“Huh, well this would create quite a conundrum for the couple who are displeased with us.” Merlin shrugged. “It matters not. We will have the water.”

“Mmmm water, almost as good as having you. How long a ride?”

“A couple hours.”

Eggsy was already yawning, he had not gotten enough sleep. “Can we switch me to your lap?”

“Of course,” Merlin agreed, and they swung Eggsy about. He curled into Merlin.

“Don’t drop me.”

“I would never,” Merlin swore, and they set off for the next camp site. Eggsy never quite fell asleep on the ride, but he drifted, thoughts of last night, and felt the warmth of the sun against them. Riding was never going to be a favourite of his, but doing it like this was a lot better than on his own. Merlin smelled great. He snuggled in a little more and trusted Merlin to keep him safe. He hadn’t trusted anyone would do that since he was 6.

But he trusted Merlin.

His eyes opened once and he could swear he saw sand swirling in the distance a million colours in it. But he squeezed his eyes shut. Merlin’s god would not be so cruel to pull him back to the future now. Not when he had been giving everything

A couple hours later they arrived and he could smell the water. “Merlin,” he begged.

“We attend to camp first,” Merlin said.

“I hate being a good person,” Eggsy groused, but slid off the horse. Camp was set up quickly, Eggsy still useless at putting up the tents, but invaluable at distracting the children who wanted to ‘help’ with the work. They played games and sang, and Eggsy ended up with a baby in his arms, which he never objected to. A couple of the women had taken to calling him the baby charmer. More than one night he had been pulled from their pallets to help soothe a crying baby. In 2016 he could have thought of he and Merlin adopting, or a surrogate. Here not really an option. But he could live being the baby charmer. The animals were cared for, and the men went to have their bath. “Ugh, I want the water.”

“A longer wait than you expected, I think we will not bathe with the women.”

“Why? You think I’d -” Eggsy frowned at him. He wouldn’t give a damn about the women.

“I think that if we wait, we can have the water to ourselves,” Merlin said, “in the setting sun. Us, alone.”

“Oh,” Eggsy smiled slowly. “Yeah, I can wait for that.” Time moved the slowest it ever had for him and he played games with Rebkah and Omar, and as usual with a move the party began early, and Eggsy sang a few songs. He saw Merlin standing at the edge of the crowd cloth in hand. “And...bye,” he said with a bow. He ignored the whistles, Rebkah of course the loudest, and hurried over to Merlin. 

They went to the water, and Eggsy almost wept. “Fuck look at all of it.” He was ready to dive in, clothes and all. He then cursed. “Come on!” he shouted. Merlin started to laugh. “It is not funny,” Eggsy said and Merlin was just laughing more. So much so that he fell to the ground. Eggsy snapped his fingers and the goat looked up from where it was chewing at scrub. “How the fuck did you get loose?” The goat went back to eating. Eggsy grabbed the rope around its neck but it wouldn’t go. “Fuck, goat, I want to get my fuck on. In water.” Eggsy went and put the goat oh his shoulders and jogged back to camp. Because he knew now how to carry a goat. Ali was clearly looking for said goat, and tried to thank Eggsy profusely; Eggsy knew that would take forty minutes and just ran back to the oasis.

Out of the corner of his eye, the sand called to him.

He took Merlin’s advice from long ago and ignored the call. When he was back to the water’s edge he couldn’t see Merlin? “Merlin?”

“Here,”  Merlin called and Eggsy rounded the scrub. He’d never need another fantasy again, as he watched Merlin walked out of the water towards him. “The goat back home.”

“Yeah, and fuck you that you didn’t take care of that yourself.”

“I have the jar, if you wish to fuck me, I see no problem with that.” Merlin twisted and dove under the water.

It had been months that Eggsy had accepted this was his reality now, but this moment, he was sure it was all a dream. He stripped off his clothes, and walked into the water, and sighed. Oh that felt better than pretty much everything. He let himself sink under the water and came back up. “Heaven, this is heaven,” he said and saw Merlin a bit away. He gave a few small kicks and was next to him. “You look so good wet, baby,” he said.

“As do you,” Merlin pulled him close and kissed him. Eggsy forgot to kick, and they sank under the water wrapped around each other, until the hit the bottom, that part of the pool not very deep. They pushed back up, and once above broke the kiss. “Eggsy, my beloved, you look very content.”

“Yeah, well, I got water, and you. Pretty sure I don’t need anything else in this world,” Eggsy kissed him again and then pulled away and with a cheeky grin, splashed Merlin. “Whoops!”

Merlin laughed and splashed back, and soon it was a childish water fight. Eggsy loved it, a chance to be goofy with Merlin was a rare thing, but the way the man laughed. It was the best sound ever. Eventually they used scrub and sand to clean their bodies a little more, and then they lay together on the cloth, feet still in the water, and staring up at the stars. The fires of camp offering just a little illumination. They could hear instruments and singing faintly.

“Merlin?”

“Aye?”

“This is a perfect moment.” Eggsy smiled as Merlin brought his hand to his mouth and kissed it. “Thank you.”

“You are very welcome, Eggsy.” Merlin was watching the stars. “There, a shooting star. Do you wish on those?”

“Of course,” Eggsy said. He closed his eyes and wished to stay where he belonged. “Gotta make a wish on a star.”

“Was it a good wish?”

“It was, what about you?”

“I need no wish, when I have the gift of you next to me,” Merlin replied.

Eggsy made a face at him. “Too much.”

Merlin smiled. “Very well, I wished that you become most favoured by the goats.”

Eggsy rolled on top of Merlin and faked pummeling him. “Luckily, since you said it out loud it won’t come true.” Merlin’s legs spread a bit and Eggsy sank between them. “That sort of talk leads to no blow jobs.”

“Does it now? My sincerest and truest apologies.”

Eggsy snorted a bit and kissed him. “You sure no one will come to bother us?”

“I am pretty sure that Rebkah would murder any who tried. She heartily supports our union.”

“Good,” Eggsy said and worked his way down Merlin’s body that was perfectly bathed in moonlight and stars. When they walked back to camp, the sand called to Eggsy, and he ignored it.


	11. Chapter 11

Merlin was drifting off, and made a noise of protest when Eggsy got up out of his arms. “Need a quick wee,” Eggsy whispered and Merlin let go. He didn't, he was just restless, as he had been the last few weeks at night. Merlin had tried to fuck it out of him, but too many nights, found Eggsy awake. He would sit at the edges of camp and watched the desert. Sometimes the sand called to him, sometimes it didn't. Eggsy went outside and figured actually a piss wouldn't be a bad idea. He went down the row of tents to the right area and took a quick leak, more a dribble than anything. He started to walk back, but stopped. His heart, his perfectly healed and filled heart hurt. He looked up and realized it wasn’t as bright as usual out; the moon and stars in the distance darkened. He looked around a bit, and saw the storm. Fuck, sandstorm. Shit, he needed to warn everyone. It was still really far away, they had time to prepare. Eggsy willed himself to believe it was a normal storm.

Ali was walking towards the trench, and smiled at Eggsy. “You should be abed.”

“We need to wake everyone up,” Eggsy said. “Hurry.”

“Why?” Ali looked to the horizon, around camp. “I see no threats. It is a beautiful night.”

“But -” Eggsy looked back and the storm didn’t seem to be moving any closer. “There?”

Ali looked and laughed. “My friend do you see portents in the stars now? A gift from where you are from you have not told us about?”

“Mirage, you know my eyes and the desert,” Eggsy finally said. Accepted. “Have a good night.” He clapped a hand on Ali's shoulder and squeezed.

“Tomorrow you can help me with the goats.”

“I am going to be busy, sorry,” Eggsy replied. He walked back to his tent, and looked at the horizon the storm was still there. Waiting.

Waiting for him.

“Give me a moment,” he whispered to the skies, to the heavens. “Just one," he begged. Though he knew it would wait. He was the one who summoned it after all. His broken heart had brought the first one about, he now realized, and his fully healed heart made it return.

Merlin was asleep in the tent, and Eggsy looked at him. Sleep made some people look soft, vulnerable, not him though. Even when Merlin was dreaming he looked ready to murder. Eggsy loved that. He went to the chest, pulled out a bit of paper and a pencil. He wrote down a bit, not enough, there could never be enough for what he had to say to Merlin. He could stay, have time to say all the words that needed to be said.

But he couldn’t stay. He knew that. He didn't like it, he wanted nothing more than what he had had all these months, with Merlin, with the tribe who had accepted him. But in them healing him, he knew he had to let go.

Eggsy put his note next to Merlin’s head on the pillows. He picked up Merlin’s hand, and kissed it. The man slept hard, the kiss didn’t wake though he tried to curl around Eggsy. “I love you,” Eggsy said softly. “Don’t think you’d ever understand how much. You keep saying I’m a gift, you were the gift, yeah?” 

He had to take a breath. Thank god Merlin was asleep. He didn’t know if he could have done this if Merlin was awake. “I can picture it. So easily. Staying. Being loved. Loving you. Riding. Traveling. We got lucky, your people don’t care, they love us. But most of the rest of the world would. A wrong step in front of the wrong person, and we’re dead. Can happen in my time, but not as much, not in London. Loving me, could hurt you, and I couldn’t bear it.” Eggsy wiped a tear away. “I’m twenty five, Merlin, and I know what is coming. I’d live through seeing the world torn apart twice. My time, we are doing a good fucking job at burning it all down. But it isn’t the same. The Great War is coming, and we’d fight in it, because we couldn’t not, and god, I live through that, we live through that, you’d die, and I’d live to see...I’d live to see even worse. I can’t. I wish I was strong enough to be witness to all that, be a hero or something, but I can’t. Not in those times. I don’t understand time travel, but in my time, I never told you properly, I saved the world once. If I stay does that fuck with that? Is time a loop? I don’t know, but I can’t risk that. I can’t choose us over the world. And if you were awake and looked at me, I would.” Eggsy wiped a tear away. “I love you, Salim. I’m going to love you forever. You said one night, during those perfect talks of ours, you would be one of the world’s forgotten men, like most. You won’t be, not ever.” 

Eggsy brushed his lips against Merlin’s. Barely there. “You’re going to be remembered into the next century. No one will ever have me again. Staying yours, until I die.” He couldn’t say goodbye, the word stuck in his throat. “Allah watch over him,” he prayed. He didn’t really believe but Merlin did, so fuck it, why not try.  Eggsy got up and he didn’t look back, couldn’t. If he did he’d falter, and he knew there wouldn’t be another chance. If he didn’t go now, he would never return home. Hell, maybe he had already missed it. But when he went to the edge of the tents, the storm was still out there. It hovered. Waited.

Eggsy froze for just a moment. He still had time to stay. To just live a life where he was loved, where he mattered to people.

He didn’t matter to people back home.

But he mattered to the world, to people who would never know his name, or see him. “We only take a life to save another,” he whispered to himself. His life, his heart for the world. Fair trade. It hurt putting one foot in front of the other, but he did. He walked steadily to the storm that never moved. Fuck, he hoped he was right and not just walking into his death, that would be a shitty Twilight Zone twist to all of this. But the storm felt different than what sand was supposed to feel like. He laughed a little, he could tell the difference in sand now. The winds picked up as he moved closer, the sandstorm seemed to be reaching for him.

“Merlin, I’m going to remember you,” Eggsy said. Prayed, because what if he forgot the man? He wouldn’t. His heart was too full to forget. Eggsy closed his eyes and stepped into the storm. “Salim,” he whispered one more time before everything went black.


	12. Chapter 12

When he woke up, he knew it was a hospital. The antiseptic smell, the hum of machines.

Machines.

He opened his eyes, and saw the monitors he was connected to, and let out a sob. It had worked. A part of him hoped it wouldn’t have, that Merlin would have to find him again. A whine escaped his throat before he could stop it. A primal, aching sound, because it would be 2017 now, Merlin had died at some point, and fuck if he’d even be able to find out when. There weren’t going to be records, a grave to be found. “Merlin,” he rasped out loud. “Merlin.” He couldn’t stop the sobs that ran through his body, and caused the machines to scream. They sounded so loud after the quiet of the last year.

“Eggsy, calm yourself, please,” a voice begged beside him. “Merlin is not here. I am, you are safe. You were found in the desert yesterday. You are malnourished and dehydrated.”

Eggsy looked at the man next to him in utter shock. “Harry?”

“Yes,” Harry reached out, and squeezed his hand. “You had me so worried. I’ve been searching frantically for you for the last three weeks.”

“Almost a year gone, and it is three weeks of looking?” Eggsy shook his head. “Doesn’t even surprise me.”

Harry looked at him in confusion. “Eggsy, it has been a month.”

He felt like his guts were being carved out with a spoon. “It’s been a year.”

“A month. When you never called after a week, I grew concerned.”

“No, you wouldn’t have, you don’t care about me,” Eggsy said it easily, in too much turmoil from leaving Merlin, from the question of how much time, to care at how Harry flinched. “One week wouldn’t make you look for me. And your Merlin has made it clear that no one would search for me ever.” Eggsy would never refer to the quartermaster as his, not after he had had the true Merlin for so long.

“We are currently without a permanent quartermaster. His assistant is trying hard, but not suited to the task, we will likely steal someone from MI-6,” Harry explained.

“Why, you like him? When I tried to lodge a complaint, you said he was competent at the job, and personality conflicts were irrelevant.”

“I thought you were wanting to complain about him being a cold bastard.”

“No, I wanted to complain about him deliberately sending me out with the wrong or insufficient equipment for the job. But you assumed again, that I couldn’t have a good reason.” Eggsy sat up, the machines were still making so much noise that a nurse had come in. “Give us a minute,” he told her. He must have sounded dead serious, because she quickly left the room. He took a few deep breaths, to calm himself, to calm the machines. “Harry -”

“No,” Harry looked at him. “You are right. I did the same thing. I assumed about you, when I had no reason to. I was so overwhelmed, being Arthur was harder than I thought, so much harder, and infinitely exhausting, and you came in and I was tired, and I didn’t listen -- didn’t pay attention. Why didn’t you tell me he was abusing you?”

“He treats all the Kingsman like shit.”

“No, he had a special vitriol for you. I went over the files. I saw his notes, the security feeds. And if I hadn’t gone when you were a week late checking in, he would have not informed me. You would have been left in the wind.”

“And you came to find me,” Eggsy looked at him. “Because I was a week late, and I have been gone a month. You fired him because of me.”

“No, Eggsy, I killed him because of you,” Harry said simply.

“Why? I’m nobody,” Eggsy replied. 

“It is to my great shame that you think that, and I am sorry. Because you are very much somebody.” Harry looked just broken. “He betrayed what the Kingsman are supposed to be, and had too much knowledge. So, he has been removed from the equation. I came to find you, brought a team of four Kingsman, and six techs. We were scouring the country, the desert. Roxy was very...thorough in questioning the men we found.”

“Roxy’s here too?” Eggsy had to sit up a bit. 

“Of course, she was furious when she found you were missing.” Harry held a cup of water out to Eggsy, and oh it was cold. Eggsy hadn’t had truly cold water in a year. Unless it had all been a dream. No. It couldn’t have been. He couldn’t have dreamed a man such as his Merlin. He was clever, but not that clever. He wondered if it would be better if it had been a dream, easier to get over.

No, it didn’t matter. Dream or reality, he would never get over his Merlin.

“Harry, you should let the doctor in. I want to go home,” Eggsy said.

“Of course, dear boy. I...I will do better, as your Arthur. As your friend.”

“It’s okay,” Eggsy told him, squeezed his hand. “We’re good.”

“We can’t be, not just like that.”

“Why not?” Eggsy shrugged. “You hurt me so much, Harry, not going to lie on that. Everyone hurt me, because everyone always does. But I always was defining myself with that hurt. I was only the reflection of what I thought everyone saw. I’m not though, yeah? I’m braver, stronger, than I knew. Than anyone knew.”

“Because of V-day.”

“No,” Eggsy said softly. “No, for something else.” For giving up a dream, the perfect dream, the perfect happy ever after. “Get the doctor, Harry.”

Harry gave him almost a bow, and left the room, soon blood and urine samples were being taken; the poking and prodding seemed endless, and the doctor seemed confused. Everything was run a second time.

“This I do not understand,” the doctor had to finally admit. “You were missing a month.”

“What they tell me, felt longer,” Eggsy said.

“Your vitals would suggest that as well,” the doctor was frowning and reading. “You have some low numbers in odd places. Were you vitamin deficient before you went missing?”

“No, numbers were great, had a physical not long before I came to Egypt,” Eggsy explained. “Do I need to be worried?”

“You need to be careful with your diet for the next few weeks, a lot of greens and fruit. You are almost courting scurvy.”

“Scurvy?” Eggsy stared at him. “What the fuck? Who gets that in a month?”

“It is unlikely,” the doctor explained. “Your potassium is low. All your numbers seem more skewed to a person on a limited diet for months, even a year. Not the few weeks your friends say you were missing.”

“Almost a year, you say?” Eggsy bit his lip. “You sure?”

“No, because you were gone a month, but you need to work with a dietician, and your doctor to improve your overall health,” the doctor declared. “We want to continue your hydration, but you’ll be able to leave in the morning.”

“Sure,” Eggsy agreed. “Hey, can I ask a question? More a history question than medical?”

“Of course, though I don’t know if I can help.”

“Are there historical records of the Bedouin tribes around the turn of the twentieth century?”

“Some?” The doctor was clearly guessing. “Perhaps? Trade records, poems. Are you looking for a specific group?”

“Yeah, and one man in it,” Eggsy said. 

“That...could be difficult,” the doctor said politely. 

“Yeah, just heard a story, and was interested, fact or fiction, you know?”

“Likely a fiction,” the doctor said. “Bar stories about heroic great grandparents in the sand and the like.”

“Sure,” Eggsy agreed. “Thanks.”

“Would you like a shower?”

“Oh fuck, yes,” Eggsy said.

“I will send a nurse to show you where,” the doctor smiled and left. 

A year, it was like his body had been fucked up for a year. Eggsy smiled to himself, and began to laugh. It was a wrecked, hysterical sound, that brought Harry running into the room - Roxy too. But he just could not stop. “Scurvy,” he said, and the laughter mixed with sobs. “I have fucking scurvy.”

“At least that is an easy fix? I’ll go buy you an orange?” Roxy was as close to panic as he had ever seen her. “What can I do?”

“Nothing,” Eggsy looked at her. “I mean, an orange would probably be good.” He watched as she ran out of the room. “Harry, my legs feel fucked, can you help me with the shower?”

“I can,” Harry promised. The nurse took them down the hall, and hovered until Eggsy promised that Harry would help him. They got Eggsy out of the medical gown and Eggsy moved under the tepid spray, Harry ready to catch him, if he got weak.

“Oh, that feels so good, I have felt so gritty, for so long,” Eggsy let the shower wash away his tears. Didn’t worry about soap for the moment, just wanted the wet. “What’s the longest you’ve spent off grid, Harry?”

“Three month mission on a small island. It was dreadful.”

“You imagine things?”

“Like imaging being at the cinema? Of course.”

Eggsy twisted under the spray and Harry cursed, a stream of words that would have appalled even Eggsy's mates. “Wot?” Eggsy was a little shocked at the filth Harry as saying. “Harry are we compromised?”

“Eggsy, that scar is not in your file,” Harry came close, not caring that the shower was getting his suit wet. “Eggsy, when did this happen?”

Eggsy realized that he meant the scar under his arm that crossed from ribs to his back. “You can see it?” It had happened in that raid, the one where he became a part of the tribe. He ran his hand along the angry scar, it had healed months ago, but not exactly to the standards of modern medicine.

“Of course I can see it,” Harry’s hand reached out, and did not touch. “Eggsy that is a very large scar. And not in your file,” he repeated. “It is new.”

“Not so new,” Eggsy said. He pressed his fingers against it. “Few months old.”

“It cannot be,” Harry protested. “It looks it, but that makes no sense.”

“I know,” Eggsy said. The scar was real. He was malnourished for longer than a month. The calendar said a month, but everything else said different.

His heart said different.

“Harry, I need to go to a library before we leave tomorrow.”

“Of course,” Harry said.

The next day, Harry was stunned by the amount of Arabic that Eggsy was speaking, and they were brought to a private room, some files brought. Eggsy searched through, and eventually thought maybe he had found something, but it was just a vague list of groups. “Fuck, where are you Merlin?”

“Eggsy, he is buried in the woods behind the estate,” Harry said, “This has been too much. We need to get you home.”

“No, one more thing.”

“I don’t know. Something is wrong with you Eggsy and I don’t know if -”

Eggsy looked at Harry, resolute firm. “I do.” He had Harry drive them an hour west, and got out of the car. He knelt in the sand, looked out at the horizon. “I hope...You are remembered. I promise, Salim. You are going to be remembered.” He touched his head to the sand, let it graze his lips. He pressed his hand to his heart. “You were carried to the 21st Century, Merlin. You’ll believe enough for both us of that we’ll meet again. And fuck it, I’m going to believe a little bit too.” Eggsy had nicked a urine sample jar from the hospital, and he filled it with sand and got back in the car. “Okay, let’s go home. I need the rain.”

“What is going on, Eggsy?” Harry looked so concerned. Eggsy realized how much Harry was his friend, he just wasn’t so good at doing it. Just like Eggsy hadn’t been good at valuing himself. Merlin had taught him how to do that. He could teach Harry how to be a good friend.

“You wouldn’t believe me.” There had never been anything so heartbreaking as Eggsy’s smile. Except of course for Eggsy’s broken heart.

“I will believe you,” Harry promised.

“His name was Merlin. Salim,” Eggsy began, “And I loved him over one hundred years ago.” 


	13. Chapter 13

Eggsy hung up his phone and if he wasn’t a gentleman, he would have thrown it against the bloody wall. “Fucking wanker,” he snarled. “Need a letter of recommendation my arse.” He stormed up to Harry’s office. “You, you know people. Know people for me.”

“Still no luck?” Harry asked.

“No, I don’t have the academic or military background to just go into the archives, so they are making me jump through these bullshit hoops, and then find a few more. You have to have connections enough to get me into those files.”

“I might, but I tend to use them for saving the world, not looking through military commissions and letters.”

“His da was an anomaly,” Eggsy said. “There would be records out the wazoo about him.”

“If he was just a private or some such, it is unlikely.”

“No, he weren’t, Salim was very clear. His da had been important. It was a big fucking deal when he walked into the desert to be with a woman. And he mentioned that his da had sent letters back. Cartography, star charts. He was in good enough standing he was able to send Salim to an English boarding school, but those records went up in a fire. The military will have a record of his da. And maybe...maybe if I follow that trail, I can find more to follow.”

“Eggsy, it has been almost a year.”

“I know, but it isn’t affecting my work. And I need to try.”

“Have you considered...perhaps an evening out? At a club?” Harry’s voice was a mix of soft and stiff. Awkward at suggesting someone go out and get laid. Eggsy would have appreciated it, if it didn’t offend him.

“Harry you suggesting I go on the pull?” Eggsy looked at him. “I’m a married man. Or near as I could be with him.”

“Eggsy…”

“Look, I know you try to believe me, and I appreciate that Harry, how hard you are trying,” Eggsy smiled at him. “But I also know you don’t really believe me.”

“There is enough physical evidence to suggest something occurred,” Harry replied. 

“But me falling in love with a half Scots, Bedouin man in 1902, sounds completely stark raving mad? And even worse is me staying faithful to that?” Eggsy shook his head. “Don’t expect you to understand, Harry. I barely do. I just know. I’m his, and sure I could go out and find a random fuck, but it would hurt my soul no matter how good it made my body feel.”

Harry stood up. “I do know someone, who knows someone. Come along, Eggsy.”  Eggsy followed him out of the office, and down into the shop. “What was the name of the father again?” Harry was typing on his phone.

“Col. Hamish Mc…” Eggsy for just a moment blanked, and had to stop walking. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” He turned and braced himself on the display table. “Come on. Col. Hamish McInnes, no McTavish, fuck, where did it go. Col. Hamish -”

“McLullich,” a voice said.

“Right, thanks babe, always say it wrong. Swear that’s been half my problem trying to find you.” Eggsy said, automatically. He went so still, that he swore he could feel the blood moving in his veins. He couldn’t look. “Harry?”

“Yes?” Harry’s voice was calm, that terrifying calm before he murdered someone.

“Harry, I need you to tell me if there is a man around your age in the shop, who just supplied me with the name I couldn’t remember.” Eggsy didn’t turn. Didn’t look, because if he had imagined the voice, he would break all over again.

“There is indeed a man in the shop, one that I do not know.”

“Harry? As in Harry Hart?” the voice, his Merlin’s voice said. “Oh, I have been wanting to have a conversation with ye.”

Oh, shit, that was not good.

“You know about me? Eggsy spoke of me?”

“Aye, he did,” Merlin replied, and Eggsy winced when he heard the sound of a punch. He managed to move then, and turned. Harry was on the floor, stunned, clearly reaching for a weapon. Merlin was standing above him, wearing his robes and head covering. Also reaching for a weapon.

“Stop, it’s okay, Harry and I are square,” Eggsy said.

“He hurt you,” Merlin shook his head. “I need to explain to him the dangers of hurting you.”

Eggsy had to smile at that. “Over a hundred years, and you are still overprotective of a stone cold killer.” He moved closer and touched Merlin’s shoulder. “I had some of it wrong, okay? He is fine. We’re fine. We’re sorted. You don’t need to protect me from Harry.”

“Then the other Merlin, the one that made you hate my name.”

“Harry took care of him.”

“Well then perhaps he is not completely useless,” Merlin said. He held out a hand to Harry, to help him up. “I am Salim, Son of Hamish McLullich and Jacinda Khan, daughter of -”

“You don’t have to give the full list, babe,” Eggsy said. “Salim McLullich works here.” He squeezed the shoulder. “Am I touching you?”

“You are,” Merlin wasn’t turning his back on Harry, just in case. “My apologies,” he said to Harry.

“You’re real,” Harry was dumbfounded.

“Of course I am, would you doubt the word of a man as loyal and heartfelt as Eggsy?” Merlin was stepping forward, ready to murder Harry it seemed, and Eggsy put himself between them. 

He touched Merlin’s face. “Salim,” he whispered.

“I was awake, when you left,” Merlin replied. 

“Why didn’t you say something?”

“You would have stayed, and you would have withered away, until you were not my Eggsy. It was not the place for you, no matter how I tried to make it be.” He leaned his forehead against Eggsy’s. “I let you go. To hold on, I couldn’t. You needed to leave. No matter what my heart wanted.”

“How are you here?”

“We were traveling, and there was a storm on the horizon. Rebkah, she said, it looked wrong. Like none we had seen before. But I had seen it. It was what brought you to me. I kissed her cheek and said that the storm was for me. I rode to it before anyone realized what I was doing. Rebkah, I think, must have stopped them from following me. I rode to the edge of the storm, and then sent the horse back to them. I thought of you. Of how you were important, and I was not. I thought, you were needed in your time, I was not in mine. And I walked into the storm and walked out in London. This is London yes?”

“Yeah,” Eggsy said.

“It is very loud.”

“It is,” Eggsy agreed.

“Finding the shop was difficult, though the area has not moved from when I had last been here.”

“Which was?”

“1865,” Merlin answered Harry. 

“I see,” Harry said. “Eggsy, I think you need a few days off?”

Eggsy looked into Merlin’s eyes. “Yeah, just a few. Wanna see where I live?”

“I just want to see you.”

Eggsy pressed his forehead to Merlin’s, sure this was somehow still a dream. He tilted away, and took the head covering off. He handed it to Harry who took it. “I was scared sometimes that I dreamed you,” Eggsy whispered.

“As was I. You were gone a month and I was a shadow without you. You were gravely missed."

“Been almost a year for me,” Eggsy said. “I haven’t -”

“I know, you are mine,” Merlin said, so sure of Eggsy, of their love, that Eggsy cracked a bit and a tear fell.

“I am,” Eggsy agreed. “Come on, let’s go get some quiet.”

“Is there such to be found here?”

“Not really,” Eggsy said, “but close enough.” He lead Merlin outside, and thank god there was a Kingsman driver out front to take them to Eggsy’s flat. He watched Merlin watch the world fly by, and Merlin be clearly nervous in the lift, but he relaxed once they were in Eggsy’s flat. “Quieter?”

“It is.” Merlin paced around the space a little.

Eggsy had redecorated in the last year. Huge national geographic pictures of the area of the desert he had been in. Antique swords on the wall. Rugs like what he had slept on covered his floors. “I put as much of you around me as I could,” he explained. He had to pour himself a drink. His hand shook as he raised the glass to his lips and Merlin’s hand covered his, put the glass down. “Salim,” Eggsy shook his head. “This can’t be real. You can’t have left your whole life for me.”

“Eggsy, my gift, you are my life, I just followed where it went.”

Eggsy didn’t cry, but he turned and pressed his face into Merlin’s neck, breathed in that dry desert scent that Merlin carried. “I missed you every day, with every breath.” 

“I was the same. I had to take the chance, to find you.”

“And you are here.”

“I am.”

“Will you get to stay?”

“Allah would not part a love such as ours again.” Eggsy tilted his head up, and looked at Merlin, and fuck the man’s eyes were wet with tears; his small smile was there, not a memory, right there. Eggsy had to kiss his lips. It was tentative at first, scared that Merlin would fade like an mirage. But he was there, and real, and the kiss swiftly grew hungry, desperate. They had been starving, and now there was a feast before them.

Eggsy took Merlin to his bedroom, and there was no slow undressing, just both of them stripping off their clothes as quickly as possible, until they were naked. Eggsy pushed Merlin onto the bed and climbed on top of him. “Salim,” he said and kissed him. Hands were everywhere, stroking pressing, and Eggsy worked his way down Merlin’s chest, needing the man’s cock in his mouth. He moaned at the weight of it on his tongue, having missed this so much.

“Is it too much to hope you have traded for a jar, Eggsy?” Merlin asked, his hands tight in Eggsy’s hair. Eggsy had to laugh a little around the length in his mouth and pulled off. He reached over and opened his bedside table. He pulled out the small bottle.

“Lube, specifically for sex, bit better than the jar,” he explained. “Wanna test it out?”

“Oh, very much,” Merlin agreed, and rolled them over.

Eggsy coated Merlin’s fingers and cursed when the first pressed into him. “Oh god, babe.”

“You know I am not such,” Merlin pulled the finger almost all the way out, and pushed it back in. “I am just a man.”

“Mine.”

“Yours,” Merlin agreed, and Eggsy tilted his face up for a kiss. Merlin was trying to be gentle, but they were both too needy and Eggsy arched his hips.

“More,” Eggsy demanded and there was a bit too much sting when the second finger was added but Merlin pulled out and added a little more lube. For a moment he was clearly fascinated by the texture, and Eggsy saw the man who had studied the stars, and tried to sketch the things that Eggsy had described to him. “Later you can study it, and all the other interesting things I have in that drawer.” He laughed when Merlin’s eyes snapped to the small table. “Later,” he promised, and the slide of Merlin’s fingers was easier this time. 

It was fun to have Merlin’s patience completely wrecked. The man had always been gentle and considerate, and he wasn’t hurting Eggsy now, but there was an edge to it, a desperation. Eggsy nodded when Merlin asked if he was ready and then Merlin was pushing into him and it was so fucking good. “Salim, fuck, babe,” he groaned.

“Yes,” Merlin’s head dropped to Eggsy’s shoulder as he sank all the way in. “This would have been difficult to live without.”

“You said you’ve been a month. Almost a year for me, only using what’s in that drawer. Which it is good stuff, but your cock is a lot better. You are better.”

“You are the best,” Merlin whispered, and his hips started slow but they both needed more, needed an ache, to know it was real. His hips went faster, his hands bruised, and Eggsy knew he was scoring marks all over Merlin and did not give a fuck. Usually he wanted Merlin’s hand around his dick, but the feel of this was just all too much and he was coming between their bodies. He felt dizzy, near to blacking out but he kept moving, until Merlin tipped over the edge and sank his teeth into Eggsy’s shoulder. He collapsed next to Eggsy and held him close. “Eggsy.” It was all he could say.

But Eggsy understood everything that was in that word. “I would have survived without you. But I would have been just a little hollow. Eternally lost, waiting to see you again.”

“You don’t believe in heaven.”

“Merlin, I don’t believe in much. But I did believe somehow, someday, we’d see each other again.” Eggsy gave him a soft kiss. “I am very happy it was today.”

“It will be everyday,” Merlin swore. They were quiet, just reveled in each other. “Eggsy? I am of two minds.”

“What is it?” Eggsy waited for the odd philosophical conversation that usually happened after they fucked. 

“I want to know what other secrets that drawer holds, but I also want to know if you were telling the truth about showers.”

“Well see, we go have a nice shower, we’ll probably be ready to play with some of the fun stuff in that drawer,” Eggsy said, and his grin was wicked.

“You are truly a smart man, my love.”

Eggsy rolled out of bed, and held out his hand to Merlin. “Let me show you a couple things we’ve got going on, I think you’ll like.”

“I look forward to it.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for reading this romantic tale

“I know you aren’t a fan of the tube, babe, but I swear this is different,” Eggsy promised Merlin. “I mean it is still the tube, but at most a couple other people on it.” Merlin had been trying hard, and there were somethings he was adjusting to, but London was overwhelming, and the noise of it all was giving him headaches. Everything was just too close. He didn’t know how his plan would go, but it couldn’t hurt to try, and Harry agreed to it. But first they had to get on the bullet train. “Trust me.”

“Of course,” Merlin said, and Eggsy pressed his hand to the mirror and they sank down to the bullet train. “I dislike being underground.”

“I know you do, babe, but this is a lot quicker than car, shaves off an hour.” Eggsy pulled him in for a kiss, knowing that would help him. “I know you hate London.”

“I do not know it enough to hate it yet. But it is much different than I remember.” Merlin kept his arms around Eggsy. “I will adjust. You did.”

“Yeah, but I didn’t have a lot of choice. I can at least provide you with a couple options.” They reached the bottom, and the bullet train was waiting. They got on and looked around. “And the big advantage to this?” Eggsy swung his leg over Merlin’s lap. “Bit more fun to be had passing the time than on the public tube.”

“And there are not cameras on here?”

“So we’ll give them a show,” Eggsy promised, and kissed Merlin. The time passed much quicker than usual. When they arrived, he dragged Merlin up and out behind the estate to all the cleared land, the woods on the edge. “It isn’t the desert. But it is space to breathe.” He watched Merlin look around, worried that maybe all this green was the wrong call. But Merlin closed his eyes and breathed in. All the tension seemed to leave the man, and Eggsy felt himself relaxing. “Yeah, yeah this is good.”

“May we stay here for the day?”

“We can stay for the day, the week, the month, the year if you want. Spoke to Harry. We are welcome to take over one of the suites in the estate for as long as we need. We want.”

“You love the city. Your mother and sister are there. Your friends.”

“And on the bullet train, not so bad to go in. You matter more, Salim. Have to be calling you that more here, just because there used to be a Merlin, and people would get confused.” And oh did Merlin’s eyes go flinty at that. “You don’t have to go talk to him,” Eggsy said quickly. “Harry killed him. The new quartermaster, Morrigan is aces. Swear down.”

“Very well. Is there a grave I may piss on?”

Eggsy laughed, and turned when he heard a shout. “Bugger, Gawain’s dog broke out again.” The Great Dane was running straight for them, and look Eggsy liked dogs, but there was a reason he had picked JB, when he thought he was bulldog, not like they got tall. He maybe moved behind Merlin who didn’t even flinch.

“No,” Merlin said firmly. “Stop.”

“Holy shit, he stopped,” Eggsy breathed out. “Gawain’s dog never listens.”

Merlin was holding out his hand to the dog. “What manner of creature is he?”

“Well, I think he’s a hell hound. But apparently, Great Dane. He is supposed to be in the kennels. Guess I have to take him over.”

“We can, I will enjoy the walk.” Merlin snapped his fingers, and the dog fell in line. Eggsy remembered Merlin with the horses, and how good he had been with them. He smiled.

“Yeah, think you’ll like what is also near the kennels.” Eggsy walked beside Merlin, and soon the outer buildings were seen; the kennel master was running towards them, leash in hand. “Hey, Brittany got loose again.”

“That dog, more trouble than 6 combined.”

“I like her,” Merlin replied. “I am intrigued. I am more used to desert coyotes, wild dogs. You train them?”

“I do, and mind them for agents gone on missions. I take care of them, and the horses we have.”

Eggsy watched the way Merlin lit up. “Horses?” Merlin asked.

“Would you like to ride sir?”

“I would like nothing more.” 

Once Merlin was on a horse, he looked more relaxed that he had the whole time there. He looked, finally at home. “We can stay here, you are certain?”

“As long as we want,” Eggsy promised.

“Good,” Merlin smiled, and was so fucking luminous that Eggsy ached. He clicked his tongue and was gone. Eggsy let him ride at the breakneck pace, followed along at a more sedate ride. He figured if he ever couldn’t find Merlin, he’d know where to look.

********

“Eggsy says you are good with a knife,” Bors sat down at the table with them. “How good?”

“I fought for my people, for my life. I stand before you,” Merlin answered. “And I am better with my sword.”

“I wanna see.”

“I work in your stables, in the kennels. There are many you could fight with here.” 

Eggsy looked between the men. “Go on, show him,” he suggested.

“Why?”

“Honestly? Because it will be really fucking hot when you kick his arse,” Eggsy shrugged. “Figure I’m allowed to be a bit of a tit, want to show you off.”

“You said the Kingsman are fearsomely trained fighters.”

Eggsy smiled, “you can take him, and then you can take me.”

“Well now then,” Merlin stood up. “Where do we do this fight?”

“Gym,” Bors said and they all went to the gym, to the practice mats.

“I require different clothing. This denim you like me in is not good for fighting.”

Eggsy knew it wouldn’t be, he had bought Merlin a size too tight on purpose, because hey, why the fuck not? He went to the lockers and returned with a pair of trackies, and Merlin not really bothered by nudity just stripped right there. The few other people in the gym, were watching them and Roxy came over. She had had a few meals with them, and Merlin was slowly warming to her. He hoped they’d be friends; Merlin still was really stiff with Harry, no matter that Eggsy promised it was all okay.

“What knife may I use?” Merlin asked. 

“Let’s go to the locker,” Bors said. He showed Merlin the training weapons, and Merlin beamed when he found the sword and knife that were rather like what he had had. Eggsy had made sure they were in the locker. He practiced with them sometimes. Merlin pulled them off their shelf and returned to the mats. Eggsy moved over to the wall, settled in to watch. 

Merlin began to move with the blades, practice strokes, settling into a dance that Eggsy remembered. “Oh I am so letting him wreck me after this,” he said mostly to himself, and a little to Roxy next to him.

“He is very fit for 52, or well what 152?” 

“Dunno, don’t care, just want to lick those abs.”

“They are firmer than even Gawain, who does a gazillion crunches.”

Eggsy nodded, and watched Merlin spin about. He saw Harry drift into the gym. “Who sent you word?”

“Roxy, of course,” Harry replied, and leaned against the wall with them. “You said he is a good fighter, but Bors is very skilled with blade weapons.”

“Nah, he’s got no chance,” Eggsy replied. He watched them move closer together, start to circle. Bors was sure in his training. But he was trained on gun first. He was good with knives, but he hadn’t been born to them the way Merlin was. And he didn’t trust them the way Merlin did. “This is going to be so fucking hot.”

“He is an attractive man, who still hates me,” Harry pouted a little. He wasn’t used to being disliked, aside from everyone who wanted him dead.

“He decided to forgive me, I am a rose that blooms in the shit of men who perform at bravery that I carry in my soul,” Roxy smiled, and she flushed a little. 

That made Eggsy frown a touch. “Oi,” he said, annoyed that he was jealous.

“Really does that compare to even half the things I’ve heard him say to you, let alone what he says in private?”

It was Eggsy’s turn to flush a bit, “Fair,” he admitted. He heard metal ring and made sure to watch the fight again. Bors was doing good, and the men were working up a sweat. Merlin was getting all slick, and he had that light on his eyes. Eggsy bit his lip. “Oi, stop playing with Bors, I need to talk to you about something important. In our rooms. For a few hours.”

“Playing?” Bors snapped. “I have him on the ropes.”

“You really don’t,” Eggsy called back. “You can pick whatever you want from the drawer,” he added as extra incentive.

“Holy shit,” Roxy and Harry both said, when Merlin snapped and went on full attack. There was just a flurry as his sword and dagger flew, Bors was pushed back again and again. He was disarmed in three minutes, Merlin held his sword to the man’s throat.

“Eggsy?” Merlin called out.

“Yeah, Salim?”

“You said that it would be too confusing for me to be called Merlin here. But I just defeated one of the knights. I think they will be able to remember, and I miss hearing that on your tongue.” Merlin let the blade graze Bors’s throat but it drew no blood. “You will be able to remember I am Merlin though not your quartermaster, will you not?”

Bors was staying very still, and looking at Merlin with awe and a touch of fear. It was very hard to make a Kingsman afraid. “Merlin, I hope you will teach me some of those moves?”

“Perhaps,” Merlin agreed, and swung the blades away. He walked over to Eggsy.

Eggsy enjoyed the walk, the sweat on Merlin, the weapons at his side.

“I am Merlin again.”

“I am fine with that,” Harry promised.

“Do I care for your opinion?” Merlin looked at him. “You are -”

“My boss and my friend, Merlin. Time to play nice,” Eggsy said firmly. “You’ve carried that grudge too long.”

“He hurt you.”

“And I hurt myself, you going to be mad at me too?”

Merlin conceded, and held out his hand to Harry. “We will have tea and properly talk.” Eggsy was happy when Harry shook it. Less happy when he leaned into Roxy and whispered something to her, with a kiss to the cheek. He goosed Merlin’s side and couldn’t complain when he was pulled into Merlin’s arms and given a thorough kiss, the sort that even made Kingsman whistle and cheer. “I wish the thing in the purple satchel,” Merlin whispered.

“Okay, bye,” Eggsy told everyone and they hurried out of the gym.

*********

The cottage was small. And perfect. It had all these pretty bushes, and JB loved the garden. It had been three months at the estate, with a few weekends in London. Merlin was better with people, but London was still a bit much. They wanted their own space though.

They found it in the village, half an hour from the estate. More people, their own house. It was good. And made sense to be close to the estate since Merlin had to be there every day for the horses and dogs, and Eggsy’s schedule was more flexible.  He didn’t like that he was leaving for three weeks in a few days. He should have more time to christen their new house. But Merlin had said he would unpack while Eggsy was gone, that time together was more important. So some christening would be done.

The new bed had been very thoroughly christened, and Merlin was cuddling him, talking of the plants he wanted to grow in their garden. Eggsy didn’t super care, but he loved listening to Merlin talk of his plans for their home.

“Am I going to come home to a whole beautiful garden?” Eggsy asked. He snuggled in closer.

“The start of it,” Merlin said. He grew quiet which was odd, Eggsy always drifted off to Merlin’s post sex chatter. “I have spoken to your mother, to Harry.”

“Thinking a new house party when I’m back. I like that idea,” Eggsy turned, and smiled at him. “Like it a lot.

“No, I was asking permission.”

“Permission?”

“To wed you,” Merlin said softly. “I have also spoken to the appropriate people in town. We can do this with a witness, before you leave.”

Eggsy melted into Merlin. “Babe.”

“You said in your time, we could wed, that we would be seen. I am already wed to you Eggsy, you know this.”

“I do,” Eggsy agreed. “I feel the same.” He ran a finger down Merlin’s cheek, the feel of the stubble that came so quick to Merlin. “My beloved.”

“I would have the law of the land, the world know what we carry inside,” Merlin said. “Before you leave. Please wed me, Eggsy. Be mine.”

“Already am, babe, but yeah, I’ll fucking marry you,” Eggsy pressed his forehead to Merlin’s. “Still sometimes not sure that this isn’t all a dream.” Merlin’s arms squeezed him so tight he could barely breathe, and the pressure felt perfect.

“If it is, then we will not wake,” Merlin promised. “But I am fairly certain this is real.”

“How can you be sure?” Eggsy looked at him. 

“Because if it was a dream, we never would have been parted, we would never hurt. And jeans would not shrink in the wash.”

“Such a crime how tight your jeans are,” Eggsy agreed, and laughed at the look Merlin gave him. “So this is all real, huh?”

“I choose to believe it such.”

Eggsy nodded a little. “Then so do I. When I get back from my mission, we’ll take a honeymoon. Know the perfect place.”

“Oh?”

“We’ll go camping in the American desert, let you see bit different sand. Think you’ll like it.” Eggsy smiled at the way Merlin lit up at that thought. “Salim?”

“Yes?” Merlin was pulling him up for them to have a quick shower before bed.

“Thanks.”

“For what?” Merlin was clearly puzzled.

“Lots of stuff,” was all Eggsy managed to say. He kissed Merlin, gently, carrying the promise of future kisses with it. “For finding me. Then for finding me again.”

“My heart could do nothing less.”

Eggsy had to smile at that. Merlin was always saying sappy shit like that. Maybe in a few decades he’d grow bored of it. But probably not. “Come on, we can talk wedding plans in the shower,” he said.

“You were right, I enjoy showers a great deal. You look good wet.”

“Damn right I do,” Eggsy agreed. He gave Merlin one last kiss. “Ordered some new things for the drawer, should be here in time for our wedding night before I leave.”

Merlin’s grin was sinful. “With my body I thee worship.”

“Yeah, forever,” Eggsy promised.

“Forever,” Merlin kissed his forehead and they went and stood under the spray and planned the future, the gift they were so lucky to have been given.


End file.
